He warned us 4 years ago, Bill Gates, that we were not ready.  Are we eally not ready?  Or are we not willing to? 

The disadvantage of Capitalism finally caught up with development of humanity, and ready to eat us up. But if you think about it, our fate is almost all in the control of our collective thinking.  Capitalism is our own brain product. We can change that, to suit the demand of the nature, as we learn about it.

Logically, the only way to win this medical battle is to stop it at the source, by giving a hard freeze for a short time to localize and pinpoint the infected region. Then treating it outside in.

But that’s not what is happening right now. So it makes people wonder… Why? Some say it’s all about money. Hmmm…

Are Human collectively suicidal? Or we are just bored out of our mind for lack of exciting projects to conquer? If we can not be more grateful, the Creator has just given us a challenging task. The punishment is Death. The reward is the next stage of evolution of the Universe playing out onto us, the collective bio-organisms on Earth, perhaps even longevity…

Which do we want to happen?

Why I live, why I die
Why I laugh, why I cry
Here is the S.O.S. from a soul in distress

I couldn’t have my feet on the ground
I’d rather be a bird roaming around
I felt bad about myself
I would like to see the world upside down
Is it more beautiful
more beautiful seen from above
from all the way high up?

I always confused life
with the comics
I feel the urge to have a fairytale
I sensed something
that’s attracting me, pulling me, lifting me
Up to high above

In the big gambling of the universe
(I thought) I did not draw the right number
I felt bad about myself
I wonder if ever it was more beautiful
More beautiful seen from above
all the way up from heaven

Why I live, why I die
Why I laugh, why I cry
I felt I was bathed in light from another dimenion

I had my feet on the ground like never
No doubt it was more beautiful
more beautiful seen from above
It will always be more beautiful seeing from above

Dream, my child, dream…

There is no jail more effective than your mental jail, where bounded by your given beliefs and when you became your own warden.

If you want freedom, you should know it is always within your reach.

If you are afraid of what you might become, set up your own examined rules, make small steps… and keep on examining them and enrich them, through new learned knowledge.

Don’t waste your life. And don’t let others waste your life. Whether there is life after this one, or if there is reincarnations, this is the one you have access to at this moment. And it will not come back.

What if you will reincarnate into one of those who you encounter, or even, would be at your mercy?

If you waste the gift of this life, what makes you deserve a better one next time?

.

.

Happiness.
How are we going to reach it?
Physically and spiritually.
It has to be both.

You can have some improvement in either world. But if you want unconditional happiness, you must have complete freedom, mental and physical. And you must be responsible to please your soul.

Nature gave us so many examples on how to cooperate with each other and prosper. God has showed us the way to eternity — cooperate, give yourself complete freedom, and give each other the freedom they deserve.

You are in my mind tonight.
I want to share a song with you,
I want to share your private moment
When we choose to stay away from the crowd.
What is in your mind?

Why? Why do I want to be alone?
My time is so limited,
That I hesitate to waste it anywhere I can not enjoy more
than a private moment with my own thoughts,
and with few friends —
people of my choice
to talk about our deepest concerns
our ultimate desires,
your life, and mine.

I dread about human future
if we continue the way we go.
I have heard so many great speeches
None of them were too optimistic
They are not wrong
Yet I am not willing to settle on that conclusion.
There must be a way
Help people to learn and understand more
about everything,
fun and easy.

I wish you all feel better about life
day after day.
After all, we are made of the same stuff
that made mouses and roaches
trees and grass
dirt and stone.
But we are made into Human
the most complicated creation
the nature made here on earth
after nearly 14 billion years of work

We are made to be human!
We aught to be grateful for what we were made into!
We can see,
we can smell,
we can taste,
we can feel.
So the question is…
What do we want to feel?
How are we going to reach it?

We can think,
We can heal,
we can create.
We can alter the path of nature
we can alter our own life
onto a different path into the future.
Which way do we want to go?
All we need to do is
to learn and understand a little more
about everything,
fun and easy.

There is no way to correct what has been done.
But we can start to think differently
to do differently
by knowing a little bit more.

Can you see
What is in the mind of our collective thinking?

There is nothing sinful about this passion.

https://youtu.be/W9FlDMCo8LU?t=38

Here is the First Lesson, and the Last

Each of us can determine what we want to learn in between, driven by curiosity and rewarded by joy of learning.  We must understand our universe as much as possible. We must understand our place in the universe, if we want to guide our behavior to align with the evolution of the universe.  What if ⇒ ( in NM → M ⇒ NM) is the next step of the evolution?  Think!  Create pleasure for our soul. Give love.  

(Can you imaging what would happen if everyone in the world listen to this voice at the same time?)

Carl Sagan: Pale Blue Dot – Chapter 1: “Wanderers”  —

“… …
There’s Antarctica at what Americans and Europeans so readily regard as the bottom, and then all of Africa stretching up above it: You can see Ethiopia, Tanzania, and Kenya, where the earliest humans lived. At top right are Saudi Arabia and what Europeans call the Near East. Just barely peeking out at the top is the Mediterranean Sea, around which so much of our global civilization emerged. You can make out the blue of the ocean, the yellow-red of the Sahara and the Arabian desert, the brown-green of forest and grassland.

And yet there is no sign of humans in this picture, not our reworking of the Earth’s surface, not our machines, not ourselves: We are too small and our statecraft is too feeble to be seen by a spacecraft between the Earth and the Moon. From this vantage point, our obsession with nationalism is nowhere in evidence. The Apollo pictures of the whole Earth conveyed to multitudes something well known to astronomers: On the scale of worlds—to say nothing of stars or galaxies—humans are inconsequential, a thin film of life on an obscure and solitary lump of rock and metal.

It seemed to me that another picture of the Earth, this one taken from a hundred thousand times farther away, might help in the continuing process of revealing to ourselves our true circumstance and condition. It had been well understood by the scientists and philosophers of classical antiquity that the Earth was a mere point in a vast encompassing Cosmos, but no one had ever seen it as such. Here was our first chance (and perhaps also our last for decades to come).
… …”

… the way to find Earth. 

“… …
IF YOU LIVED two or three millennia ago, there was no shame in holding that the Universe was made for us. It was an appealing thesis consistent with everything we knew; it was what the most learned among us taught without qualification. But we have found out much since then. Defending such a position today amounts to willful disregard of the evidence, and a flight from self-knowledge.

Still, for many of us, these deprovincializations rankle. Even if they do not fully carry the day, they erode confidence—unlike the happy anthropocentric certitudes, rippling with social utility, of an earlier age. We long to be here for a purpose, even though, despite much self-deception, none is evident. “The meaningless absurdity of life,” wrote Leo Tolstoy, “is the only incontestable knowledge accessible to man.” Our time is burdened under the cumulative weight of successive debunkings of our conceits: We’re Johnny-come-latelies. We live in the cosmic boondocks. We emerged from microbes and muck. Apes are our cousins. Our thoughts and feelings are not fully under our own control. There may be much smarter and very different beings elsewhere. And on top of all this, we’re making a mess of our planet and becoming a danger to ourselves.

The trapdoor beneath our feet swings open. We find ourselves in bottomless free fall. We are lost in a great darkness, and there’s no one to send out a search party. Given so harsh a reality, of course we’re tempted to shut our eyes and pretend that we’re safe and snug at home, that the fall is only a bad dream.

We lack consensus about our place in the Universe. There is no generally agreed upon long-term vision of the goal of our species—other than, perhaps, simple survival. Especially when times are hard, we become desperate for encouragement, unreceptive to the litany of great demotions and dashed hopes, and much more willing to hear that we’re special, never mind if the evidence is paper-thin. If it takes a little myth and ritual to get us through a night that seems endless, who among us cannot sympathize and understand?

But if our objective is deep knowledge rather than shallow reassurance, the gains from this new perspective far outweigh the losses. Once we overcome our fear of being tiny, we find ourselves on the threshold of a vast and awesome Universe that utterly dwarfs—in time, in space, and in potential—the tidy anthropocentric proscenium of our ancestors. We gaze across billions of light-years of space to view the Universe shortly after the Big Bang, and plumb the fine structure of matter. We peer down into the core of our planet, and the blazing interior of our star. We read the genetic language in which is written the diverse skills and propensities of every being on Earth. We uncover hidden chapters in the record of our own origins, and with some anguish better understand our nature and prospects. We invent and refine agriculture, without which almost all of us would starve to death. We create medicines and vaccines that save the lives of billions. We communicate at the speed of light, and whip around the Earth in an hour and a half. We have sent dozens of ships to more than seventy worlds, and four spacecraft to the stars. We are right to rejoice in our accomplishments, to be proud that our species has been able to see so far, and to judge our merit in part by the very science that has so deflated our pretensions.

It might have been otherwise. It might have been that the balance lay elsewhere, that humans by and large did not want to know about a disquieting Universe, that we were unwilling to permit challenges to the prevailing wisdom. Despite determined resistance in every age, it is very much to our credit that we have allowed ourselves to follow the evidence, to draw conclusions that at first seem daunting: a Universe so much larger and older that our personal and historical experience is dwarfed and humbled, a Universe in which, every day, suns are born and worlds obliterated, a Universe in which humanity, newly arrived, clings to an obscure clod of matter.

The significance of our lives and our fragile planet is then determined only by our own wisdom and courage. We are the custodians of life’s meaning. We long for a Parent to care for us, to forgive us our errors, to save us from our childish mistakes. But knowledge is preferable to ignorance. Better by far to embrace the hard truth than a reassuring fable.

If we crave some cosmic purpose, then let us find ourselves a worthy goal.
… …”

Carl Sagan, Stephen Hawking and Arthur C. Clarke –
God, The Universe and Everything Else (1988)

Here is the First Lesson, and the Last:

Pale Blue Dot – Chapter 1: “Wanderers”  —

(Can you imaging what would happen if everyone in the world listen to this voice at the same time?

Isaac Asimov How People Can Save The Earth for Humans

And the transcript is here.

Vaclav Smil – TEDcity 2000

These days I keep on finding people spreading the same idea in different forms, and from different angles.

“After billions of years of monotony, the universe is waking up | David Deutsch”

“…

The significance of our lives and our fragile planet is then determined only by our own wisdom and courage. We are the custodians of life’s meaning. We long for a Parent to care for us, to forgive us our errors, to save us from our childish mistakes. But knowledge is preferable to ignorance. Better by far to embrace the hard truth than a reassuring fable.

If we crave some cosmic purpose, then let us find ourselves a worthy goal.”

Bunyan Lecture 1993 – Carl Sagan (Is there intelligent life on earth?)

Cosmos 1 – “The Shores of the Cosmic Ocean”

  1:00:25

Cosmos 2 – “One Voice in the Cosmic Fugue”

 1:00:12

Cosmos 3 – “Harmony of the Worlds”

  58:23

Cosmos 4 – “Heaven and Hell”

  1:01:04

Cosmos 5 – “Blues for a Red Planet”

  1:01:13

Cosmos 6 – “Travellers’ Tales”

1:01:07

Cosmos 7 – “The Backbone of Night”

  58:30

Cosmos 8 – “Journeys in Space and Time”

  1:01:38

Cosmos 9 – “The Lives of the Stars”

  59:27

Cosmos 10 – “The Edge of Forever”

  1:03:05

Cosmos 11 – “The Persistence of Memory”

  58:25

Cosmos 12 – “Encyclopaedia Galactica”

  1:00:49

Cosmos 13 – “Who Speaks for Earth?”

1:01:59

I saw the twinkles in your eyes
the flush on your face
and the flame in you heart
when you told me that
something I said got you thinking
thinking about how to make your life better
and how to make yourself better…

You are as good as a good person can be
I just know
But you can always add more fun to your life
give a little more joyful moments to your soul
Because
You are the center of your universe

Keep that fire in your heart going
and never stop it from growing
until you start glowing
in the darkness around you
Like a star,
like a supernova
dancing in the universe
that you are creating for yourself.

I would enjoy watching you
from near
from afar
from within your heart

Time evolution of a 10Mpc region of the universe

Whatever you believe in, all that is around you is undeniable.  Why don’t we hold back the human arguments, and just pay attention to what’s around us?  Enjoy what we have in our life, and expand our own universe to as big as possible, for God is truly infinite and eternal.  Human being has come so far in knowing about our world and the universe.  The nature is truly fascinating, on a big scale, or small scale.  Miracles everywhere.

I call this following video “a long story short”

How the Universe Works – From The Big Bang To The Present Day – Space Discovery Documentary

But the miracle takes place where seemingly insignificant place:

David Attenborough’s First Life (1 of 2) – Arrival

National Geographic Documentary

AND I was sooo happy to find a video of this whole conversation:

Richard Feynman: Fun to Imagine | Using physics to explain how the world works (1983)

And we are a collection of cells, cooperating with each other:

And then you can always explore some big ideas.  But what’s the rush?

Big Ideas

Stephen Hawking’s Last Words to Humanity

TIME TO EXPAND AND EXTEND OUR SENSE OF SELF BEYOND SKIN DEEP.

“…. my thoughts drifting…
then I saw this question “are you …?”

… It woke me up, am I?… …
I just feel like a human being trying to find something to brighten up my life

”

— from a friend of mine

  * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

This is Stephen Hawking’s Last Inspiring Message to Humanity | Goalcast

Wayne Dyer – The Shift – Full Movie HD

Neil deGrasse Tyson – Brain Droppings — It got more and more interesting as he goes.

Thank You for being my friend

The Greatest Thing in the World by Henry Drummond

“尽在灵魂出窍时” ITII sai’d赛道

the ’Love‘ Seat

Origin of Life – How Life Started on Earth

Our Consciousness, the result of collective effort of 37.2 trillion cells, whether we are aware of their consciousness or not.

Of all the atoms and molecules in the universe, while most of them create spectacular supernova and hypernova, these are the ones made ME, us, with consciousness, sensation and emotion.  Isn’t that miraculous enough?  Shouldn’t we be grateful enough to…  …   What? …  What should we do?   What can we do?

The way things are happening nowadays, which direction are we going?!!

And here is one version of the understanding:  Dr. Wayne Dyer – The Shift

plus few more fun things:    7 talks to make you love science

I wanted you to come my way
scary as it is,
at least it would be fun
I understand not everyone feels that way
Some desire peace
and happy that they have found each other
I respect and have always wanted that
but when my love of you put your desire ahead of mine
or shall I say
when your desire became the most important desire of mine,
something happened…

And now,
Fate is testing the real me again,
which way do I turn?

I can’t go back to who I used to be
I can’t find another person to replace you
after taking you down from the pedestal,
you look not so different from any other figures I collected over the years. Sigh.

Without the pedestal, how do I set the stage this time?  Things are happening.

I want to touch more of those wonderful souls, with my mind.    —  Feb 2018

I want to see your face.

Talking about trusting you,
would you trust someone like yourself?

But I take risks, calculated ones.
So I will, to give my soul a chance
to find what I really want

I dare you,
to make yourself trustworthy for once
shake my hand with your soul promise
that you will do as you said, to make things happen in your life
You don’t need to bullshit me,
unlike the rest of the world,
because you can do anything you set your mind to.

And I,
let me focus,
would devote my power and energy in creating ideas, for the lasting Pleasure.

I want a connection of souls,
I want to see the world changing with you by my side
That evening, though it was brief
there was a moment that I saw your soul
trembling
Do you remember?

I want to see your face.
I want to see your soul.
Or… you are just waiting to get old?

“But I always get what I want … …”
“Sure you will.  Just not today.
What’s the rush… as long as you are having fun?”

There are very few better moments in life…
than gardening in the Spring sun
with Goldberg Variation in the air,
a bird on my shoulder,
and thinking about You…
and Florida
Disney World
my fairyland
stone layout
ideas
inventions
and You
… …

How much healing power does orgasm have?

Can it help a person shrink her tumor?

Could maintaining a prolonged orgasmic state still be therapeutic even when all other modern medical technology fail to be effective?

Shall we try?

What transforms pain into pleasure?

What transforms physical pain into physical pleasure?          Orgasm.

What transforms mental pain into physical pleasure?          Orgasm.

What transforms mental pain into mental pleasure?          Love.  Love of Life.

Why are some people dominant, and some submissive? Yes, I am talking about the people in a Dom & Sub relationship.

I believe all of the conscious ( even pre-conscious) choice came ultimately from the sense of pleasure. It gives each person pleasure to serve his/her role, even if it is physically painful. But not all Doms do the same. Neither do all the Subs. What’s the difference?

Well, the question is, what really made people choose their role? What’s their own understanding of the choice?

I want to know Your role, how you feel, and. . .     what you fear.

The Mathmagician is the one that transforms non-matter to matter, and then to non-matter again, by defining simple principles and make them operate on Math.  Then the Universe sprung into Existence.

And ALL THIS and THIS happened.

So this is your theory:

You are my child.  So you have to appear in my environment (by spreading your unfinished projects all over the house?)  And I, as a mother who raised you, therefore must be responsible for your doing.  And I also have to be the undeniable bearer of the consequence of your doing, so I should not feel so undignified and complain about you leaving messes around.

What a theory!  How can I argue about that?  You are the extension  of my existence.  Therefor it is all up to my making.  My big project is, my dear child, let’s talk about your existence.  How do you want it to be.  To me, if you turn out some how short of a certain quality, it will be my failure.  But have you thought about what do you lose?  You lose the quality of your life.  What do you want to become? How do you want your existence to be?  What do you want to experience?

I wish you would know how much power you are holding right now, in molding your life in the future, by building your personality. Start designing.  Acquire as much goodness as you can, mentally, physically, and spiritually.  Sprite is in our life.  It is part of our existence, the most important part.  As long as you keep trying, I will be happy and willing to accept my existence, with your mess in it.

But I am monitoring the progress.  And I reserve the right to take discipline action to modify my environment to my liking, since I am solely responsible of it.

Deal?

It was very interesting to see a medical doctor getting all excited about being able to understand String Theory.  Thought that I was just an interior designer, he recommended me to check out the World Science U, promising me that I would also be able to understand it if I just listen to Brian Green.   ;)  … I will.

So, my dearest, hope you can find time to enjoy understanding our universe a bit more:

https://www.youtube.com/user/WorldScienceU

http://www.worldscienceu.com/

Wow! 40 years in U.S.!!!

You are right. It is time to resolve some of the old issues, and have some real fun entertaining yourself.

True blessing often comes in disguise.  Though it doesn’t seem to be much, you are provided with peace, and all that’s necessary to live a humble yet worry free life, with rare agility to explore the world if you so desire. On top of that, you are given the satisfaction of seeing all that you care and love are well on their way to have a decent life.

You have spent your entire life entertaining others.  Isn’t it time to give some attention to yourself and allow you to be entertained by others’ creations?  As you so often reminded me, the world is beautiful when we love to live in it.

Happy birthday my sweet forever young lady!

http://www.timeout.com/newyork/things-to-do/where-to-see-the-best-fall-foliage-in-nyc?package_page=35475

Have you noticed that, the pleasure of soul does not always coincide with the pleasure of body?  And the interesting thing is, when that happens, it usually involves Love… be it any form of love, between anything, anybody.

I enjoy discovering those brave people.  They have so many exciting stories to tell!  And it often makes me wonder: “What’s her unsolved mystery of her life?”  Wouldn’t it be fun if we find ways to unravel it?

I really like brave people. And recently I am spending much time with one such lady. She is a brave Great Grandmother who finds pleasure in everything she does.  And she likes all the new food that I introduce to her.  And there are quite a lot, I assure you.  Bravo!

But what’s more interesting is her life!  There were so many moments in her life when she allowed herself to physically suffer because it pleases her soul to be able to love so much.

Interesting how she chooses to talk about the one she once really loved, when she was 27.  He was 22, a college student.  Somehow the whole story feels like a mystery to me… I mean, what’s the story about this mutual friend?  Why is she doing all that trying to reconnect them now that she is in her 80’s?

How about the stories of my many, many other brave friends?

I’m preaching Happiness.

For all those who suffer, I recommend a dose of Happiness of your own design. You deserve it, because you are the center of your universe.

There must be something possible in this world that can make you a little bit happier… even if it only lasts a brief moment.  That would be worthy of my time.

Lets give ourselves a more friendly environment.  Even though we can not achieve perfection at this moment, we can always make our living space a little more pleasant to our soul.  And all it takes is to make it a little cleaner, a little prettier.

And you, my friend.  I admire your high spirit, while dealing with all that is happening in your life.  I think it is cruel to force a wounded soul to suffer in her own home.  Thank you for showing me your courage and determination!  I want to help you heal faster by giving you that one drop of happy chemical that only I can give.  Thank you for the opportunity for offering you my service.  You are helping me in fulfilling a child’s wish.

This world would be so much better, if we make our living space a little nicer.  How much pleasure do we allow ourselves to have?  How much longer are we going to make ourselves wait?

And for those who are not struggling, I recommend a dose of Happiness of which you never had before. Bring out your curiosity and explore Life.  Allow love and pleasure to guide your way.  You’ll be pleasantly surprised.

Make our own environment a little nicer by creating few more smiling faces.  We all know how.

My thirteen-year old asked me tonight: “Could you tell a person who has given up hope in life to have faith in something? What would that be?”

“That would be the Goodness. One can find goodness even in the darkest corner.” I said.

All creatures are created with Goodness in them at birth. Take herself for example: She has a lot of goodness in her. Her hope was simply the goodness inside wanting to find goodness outside from all around, so she won’t feel so lonely. And her despair was created when the goodness in her giving up on finding goodness outside of her after repeated disappointment. I’d advice, “Look elsewhere.”

Life is a gift, NOT from parents, but from God, the true Creator, the one who created this entire Universe.

She would feel that she is very lucky to be born, if she understand the science of creating her, from the moment of Big Bang to the moment of her birth.

If I were her, I would feel great honor to be entrusted with the power of determining the fate of such creation. And maybe one would pay more attention to design a greater future, instead of wasting any more breath on painful past. Let all pain serve as a way to train our soul to be stronger, and don’t allow it to weaken our will of living. Life is the gift from our Creator to each and every one of us. It is our honor and duty to defend it. And it is our own to build and to care. Smart as you girls are, you should start putting together a personality design the way YOU want it to be.

I don ‘t want to take away your right of making childish mistakes. But I DO want to instill into you a sense of Right and Wrong. It is not defined by popular believe, but one that is timeless, that can withstand cross examination from all dimensions, in all timelines. When people do something good in the right way, the result would be prosperity. God’s wish.

I believe that All creatures are born with goodness. The rest of the characters were added on by experience, good ones and bad ones, on top of Goodness. Now, use your imagination, think about the path and pain one has to go through to arrive at his/her current personality composition. Somehow I feel a faint sense of sympathy towards those Mean and Nasty. God bless their soul.

As for us, let us pay attention to build a better future, one brick at a time. It is ours to build, ours to live in, ours to enjoy, and ours to live for.

Love yourself first. Think about what you are willing to do to make your life better. And define what truly belongs to the “Better” list, to please your heart and soul.

Handel – Largo (from ‘Xerxes’) Opera

in the most beautiful voice:

Tender and beautiful fronds
of my beloved plane tree,
let Fate smile upon you.
May thunder, lightning, and storms
never disturb your dear peace,
nor may you by blowing winds be profaned.

Never was a shade
of any plant
dearer and more lovely,
or more sweet.

Handel – Largo (from ‘Xerxes’) Opera

Someone sent me flowers today, anonymously. This is first time for me. It looks just like the one in this photo. It is beautiful. Somehow it made me thought of you – the one who was in the abusive relationship, the one we had to rescue from where used to be your home.

You are beautiful.
Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise,
even when you are hurt
especially when you are abused.

That’s what abusers do —
they always abuse your mind first
After they distorted your self-image
they create a mental illusion of a horrible outside world
so that you wouldn’t dare to move away from them.
After they’ve chained you down to their will
made sure that you would not report them to the authority
then the physical abuse began
Why?
WHY?!!!

Because he is hurt by his environment that has nothing to do with you.
Because he is a coward —
Instead of fighting back
and claim the joy of life and freedom that belongs to him
from people that hurt him
he took it out on you
using you as his outlet of frustration and pain

Because you loved him,
he made you fully responsible for his happiness —
It became yours to create, and yours to blame
In order to achieve that
he must create someone who is willing to take that abuse.
So he has to FIRST destroy your will of leaving him.
That’s why.

Hurting you is only his way of coping with his environment
But you have to know
his problem is NOT your problem
You are only responsible for your own happiness
Only YOU know what would make you happy

You are the center of your universe
Until you are truly happy
until you are loved the way you deserve
until you can love others the way you want
You could not truly make those who love you happy
Because they can feel you.
We all can feel you.

Take care of yourself first.
Think about what you want to give to your heart,
and Soul.

You are beautiful.
Don’t let your abuser convince you otherwise.

“She’s gorgeous.”
I heard a voice saying.

← Previous

Shhh… Listen
Do you hear the music in the air?
Don’t move
and relax
find yourself in the state of complete motionlessness

Slowly
Allow yourself to move with the music
or rather
Let the music move you
little by little
and a little more sometimes
maybe when each sentence starts

Do you hear what I hear?
Do you feel how the music is driving me?
And if you would
I’d like to feel how the music is moving you.
We can have a conversation this way
by dancing together
exchanging our understanding of the music
Not just moving around irrelevantly
It was orgasmic
wasn’t it?

Move
to the mood
to the melody
and sometimes
even to the rhythm or instrument of your choice

Starting from Zero movement
to the most dramatic motion your body can produce
you now have earned the Freedom
to compose your dance at will
to your interpretation of the music
associating the movement to the melody
the way feels right to you
What do you hear?

When you find the will inside you
you can move with your partner to what you hear
and listen to what she hears through her movement

I’m afraid that I got you quite spoiled. ;-)
But I’m a good dance teacher, I hope.

Who said that you can’t dance?

Dear Bruce,

Nice to hear from you. I am doing alright. Thank you for your concern.

Yes, I have not been writing the blog for a while. There are moments in life when one suddenly realizes that things are not what they seem to be. I have realized that I don’t really know anything the way I thought I do. It was humbling. And in some way, it is also enlightening. I had to reexamine my intention, motivation and qualification of writing such blog, and consider the possible impression I cast out, and the responsibility I assume in doing so. I have so much more to learn.

I am currently spending a lot more time learning, exploring humanity, making friends, collecting information about real life, instead of drawing conclusions about other people’s life that I have not much understanding of. It is a fascinating journey, towards deeper understanding. I wish I will eventually be in more light, or understand more about darkness. And hopefully someday I may even see light from within the darkness.

I am not giving up writing the blog. But I don’t know when I will be so inspired to write more, or What to write. In fact, the first section of the blog has already come to it’s own natural conclusion when I started writing about “The Art of Pleasure”. Appreciate our own existence, enjoy our environment and people around us, create our own “Art of Pleasure” — everyone can make his/her own list. And maybe share some ideas with me? I have intended the blog to record and share more than just my own findings and thoughts. A monologue should not last endlessly anyway.

I am so grateful that I have friends out there who even noticed that I stopped writing, and concerned enough to inquire. Thank you very much!!!

Sherri

The other night, a friend and I had a chat about kisses, French kisses. He mentioned that every woman kisses differently. And that reminded me of the observation I have over the years.

Looking back, I believe that the difference might very well give a clue to the kisser’s personality. Some are givers, some are receivers. But the best kissers are the one who would lead, and could follow. Then, a kiss becomes a dance, and a conversation. Unfortunately, most of the time, a giver does not know how to receive, a receiver does not know how to give. Then the whole thing becomes a monologue, a job for the giver, a burden for the receiver sometimes.

Like dancing Tango, when a leader does not know how to follow, then the dance could become a struggle between the partners. When a follower tries to anticipate the leader’s move, thinking about how fast one should follow so it would not be too slow that feels like a drag, or too fast it turns into a back leading. How to manage that? How to make a leader become a good follower?

For those who often feel stressed out, or too over conscious to relax, you are most likely a leader. I wish you would try to relax, pay attention to what you receive, try not to react more than your sluggish body have to. But do react to satisfy the need of movement, at your most relaxed state.  Be aware, Motionless is another sign of over control.

I truly believe that a person’s personality will show in the manner of action. At the same time, intentionally modifying the behavior habit could help to alter one’s mental state, and therefore affect physical state. So I believe that being able to lead and follow would be the balance that we all could try to achieve.

Relax… step into the nature, at least in your mind, and feel your environment. Pick your favorite spot, and relax. What do you like? Some likes to listen to the spring rain dropping on the banana leaves. Some likes to hear the mountain spring, the river, or the ocean waves. What’s your cup of tea?

Does the meaninglessness sound too quiet to you?  Does your mind run too fast to follow?  Why don’t you ignore it, and pay attention to the easy mood of nature – random, artistic, and ever lasting.  There is no rush.

Sweet,
sticky,
roasted coconut strips,
dipping into warm,
freshly honey roasted granola flakes.

And green tea.

And a philosophical conversation about kisses, different type of kissers, and their personality. And how I c…

It is all just a dance.
Some lead, and some follow.
Sometime the leader follows.
And sometime the follower leads.
It is all just a dance.

Sweet
sticky
roasted coconut strips
topped with Sriracha hot sauce…

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From the OkCupid Q&As:

Q: Are you Jewish?

A: No. Someone says that I am a Jew magnet. I have learned over the years that many different traditions / religions across the land share certain universal value throughout human history.

If you would believe that the shared Goodness represents the true Spirit of Light, then, all the differences become no more than humanly ‘background noise’. It should have no value if you truly believe in the Spirit of Light, some call it the Godliness.

The interesting thing about the Big Bang Theory, is that it tells us that the Intention of creating human (one of the possibility of development according to the laws of the Universe), among the creations of other magnificent life forms and galaxies… can be described by a handful of scientific laws, set at the moment when the Universe was created, manipulated by Logic.  Those laws start from

E=mC², … … and 1+1=2 (the first line in the language of creation)

and then, the particles that made all the matter
k, µ, e, p, n, H, He, O, N, C, H₂O, …

and then, how interaction causes movement
F=ma

and then, how faster and faster things move into each other
V=V₀+ a•t

and then, the amount of Gravitational Force between anything and everything, that determines the status of the cosmological body — which one is going to be a star, a planet, a satellite, comet, asteroid, etc. And believe it or not, it also determines which and when a star is going to turn into red giant, red dwarf, white dwarf, supernova, neutron star, or black hole.
F=Gm₁m₂/r²

So this is how we got together, every growing, ever renewing — and now, we put E=mC² on our blackboard for every 10 year old. (And my 12 year old was arguing with me, saying that it is just a theory — I don’t know how they teach children in the school these days. And she challenged me to prove it true. “You want me to bring a nuclear bomb here in front of you and give you a live demonstration to prove that E=mC² is a fact? Haven’t we already done that at Hiroshima?”)

Ok, let’s go back to the very beginning, the moment of the Big Bang (not the sitcom please). Time flies when Someone is having fun. And here we are — All because of those handful of Laws. In some way, the scientists are the true archaeologist, digging for the handful of Laws buried gazillion years ago, in Everything.

So now if you wish, go ahead and feel proud of being the product of this magnificent Creation at its highest form of complexity. After the transformation from inorganic to organic, to reproductive, to conscious, to emotional and logical, We are the product of the development of the Creation after multiple Quantum Leaps. We are the one who wrote “E=mC²” on the blackboard!

We are intended to surpass all other creations. We suppose to retain all the good quality other creatures have, plus more — human intelligence. But how come we are not Happier than all other creatures?  If you would expand the belief that true Spirit of the Light of Creation are shared across the spices, you’ll see why we are not happy. We human were bestowed with so much power, we forgot that we should still obey the Intention of the Creation. We suppose to cooperate with ALL: with ourselves, with other human, with other creatures, with other live forms. The entire Creation of Life is alive. We are just one of the advanced organ. And if any organ is sick, it will affect the livelihood of the entire Creation.

If we don’t allow ourselves to be happy, and also allow others to be happy, the struggle with each other among humans will waste so much resource… and one day, we would not have enough resource and time to find our way to a new home planet. By the time our sun turn into a Red Giant, it will show us just how disappointed our Creator is. And that, like a spoiled child getting annoyed by his unsatisfying sketching, he could simply wipe it off and start all over again, elsewhere — In fact the other new Creation has already happened. Don’t believe me? What do you think the Red Giant or Supernova are? They are His dry eraser. And you think he is going to feel sorry for throwing all this creation on Earth away?!! No he won’t.  He is annoyed with you! There is a deadline for us human to develop, literally. To the Creator, everything is just the matter of snapping the fingers and say: “Let there be Light.” … and Bang!!!

We are the Creation, yet we define our God, and then kill each other for our disagreement. We create politics, so we can argue with each other. We create computer virus, so we can slow down our technological development. How can that be sane?! How can that be logical?!!

Ha ha… even the old man Osho is annoyed when he talks about it:

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“One of these days we should find time to have lunch together when I … …”
“When you allow yourself to take a break.”
“… …”

That’s how we really meet. I am going there to find that break, so we can have lunch together, and talk about things. And, let’s hope that we find something more… to bring a permanent smile on that sweet, beautiful face.

“Come back, to that beautiful original YOU.” I heard a voice saying.
“Come back, and be enveloped by Serenity… “

And see if we can find it there, or here:

How the Universe Works

Also: 2010 TV-PG 8 Episodes
Average of 329,896 ratings: 4.313 stars

 

Host Mike Rowe brings viewers on an enlightening tour of our current cosmic knowledge in this miniseries that starts with the Big Bang and covers alien galaxies and solar systems, as well as the space-shattering properties of a supernova event.

THIS is the Creation.  Let’s not delude ourselves to be something more than what we are.  And if we don’t get along and cooperate with each other and find a way to reach a new home-planet before the sun dies, or before some other cosmic event destroys our earth, we will eventually be no more than cosmic dust some time in the future.  Oh, right, we will not be the ones facing the destruction anyway.  It would be our children, our future generations.  Do we care?

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Netflix Stream

National Geographic: Amazing Planet
2005 TV-PG 3 Episodes
Average of 134,063 ratings: 4.1 stars

This three-part journey from National Geographic travels into the distant past to watch our planet take shape through the actions of lava, magma and time; explores Earth’s magnificent seas; and reveals the awesome power of wind, water and ice.

We are standing on top of a burning cracking eggshell, fighting with each other, waiting to be engulfed by the flame of fury from the Creator for wasting the Gift of Life. And there is a deadline for human to redeem themselves — finding a new home, moving ALL of our belongings, before our home-world supernova takes place. And we know that the Creator always keeps the promise.  It’s all in the science.

How did we get ourselves in this position? Which way are we going?

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OSHO: “Now-Here” All the Time

OSHO is responding to the question of a visitor: Is it really possible to be in the “now-here” all the time? Most of my time seems to go in planning for, or worrying about, the future.

“Whether you know it or not, you cannot be anywhere else than here and now; wherever you are it will be here and now.

You are given only one moment at a time — and you are wasting that moment for planning or worrying about the futures; and the future never comes. What comes is always here, now: It is a series of “Nows” — one now, another now — but you are always living in the Now. There is no futures.

And what can you worry about the futures? — It is because of this kind of worrying, — and planning for the futures, that a certain proverb exist in all the languages of the world.– That,

‘Man goes on desiring, planning, worrying for the future, and God goes on disappointing him.’

There is no God to disappoint you. In your very planning you are sowing the seeds of disappointment. — In your very worrying about the future, you are wasting the present. And slowly, slowly, it becomes your second nature, to worry about the futures. So when the future will come, it will come as present. And because of you habit of worrying about the future, you will waste that moment also for worrying. You will go on worrying your whole life about the futures. You will stop only when Death comes and takes all possibilities of future from you. You missed your whole life.

You could have lived. But you only planned.

Live as intensely and totally now, because the next moment will be born out of this moment. And if you have lived totally and joyously, you can be absolutely certain that the next moment will bring more blessings, more joy.

… …

Stop this habit of planning. Stop worrying about the future. If tomorrow comes, you will be there. And if you know how to live, if you know how to live joyously and dancingly, your tomorrow will also be full of dance and joy.

… …

Postponing living for the future will take away your whole life from your hands.

… …

Even if you are planning for tomorrow, that too is being done here and now. Even if you are worrying for the future, that too is being done here and now. You can not be anywhere else whatever you do. Existence allows only, this is the space, of here and now.”

… …

“Just be clear about it. Otherwise life goes on slipping away from your hand like water. Soon you will have empty hands. And meeting Death with empty hands, is a utter failure. Meet your death with full of Joy, Silence and Serenity. Meet Death with your hands full of ecstasy. And in that ecstasy Death itself dies. You never die. Your Here- Now continues, forever, and forever…”

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You! A mother. Why do you suffer your motherhood?  It is one of the most beautiful part of your life, besides falling in love with a man and being loved in return.

You bore so much pain and struggle to give birth to this precious child, because you loved intensely!  Because you loved this total stranger who was going to be part of your life that’s closest to your heart.  You suffered so much bearing this child, did you want him/her to be just as unhappy as you were?  Or you had wished that, maybe this person, who was once part of your flesh, may have a chance to live a better life?

You are the mother. You were able to bear so much pain because the power of Motherly Love/Instinct was simply undeniable. You would do anything, or sacrifice anything to make your child happier, wouldn’t you?!!  So, measure your pleasure by how much pain and pressure you can bear to protect your child from feeling hurt. Be proud and be happy about it.

Why is your child sooo unhappy, Mother?!!

Difficult as our life maybe, there is always more than one way to interpret any event that has occurred.  You can mold your own world by manipulating the outcome using your controlled reaction to each event.  You have the power to find a way allowing yourself to be happier.

For every bit of Happiness you preserve in your child’s heart, he/she will give you back so much more in return.  Every bit of the happiness you allow others to drain from your child, will dim your world both inside and out.

And if you learn to read things in a positive light, it will brighten up your world, glowing with you.  So, people who comes near you, will also be glowing whenever they think of you.  Because you are a real Mother, you can not stop thinking about your child, and how you once wanted him/her to be happier than you were.  Give her a happy life that you couldn’t even dreamed of having.  You can.  Your Motherly Love would be your power source.  Protecting your child’s heart would be a real challenge to your wisdom and intelligence.  And it would be a fun game to win.  You have your own sanity and your child’s happiness to gain.

Your child is the one who would always love you back, if you don’t traumatize that tender heart by making your child bearing your pain of struggle.  Your constant fury could overwhelm and confuse a child’s mind, causing him/her to feel unwanted, and abandoned — while you were just venting some foul mood on regular basis.  You are so used to do that — regular venting is your way of coping and surviving the struggle of life — you couldn’t even notice how stressed and scared a child could be.  Feeling helpless and hopeless when a mother, someone who suppose to make her feel safe, turning against her is indeed very scary!  Don’t allow the struggle of life make you misrepresent yourself to your own child.  There was pure Love and Hope between the two of you when you gave birth to this child.  Serve that noble intention of yours.  It is your purely heartfelt desire.  You will become the mother you never had. And that’s how your childhood trauma gets healed.

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How much do you really appreciate being alive? I believe deep down no one wants to die, even for those who are suicidal — they just don’t want to deal with the seemingly endless pain. And people derive pain from so many things, for so many different reasons. But for those in pain, there is always a way out, though that path could be hard to find. So, pay close attention to yourself, your stress and your frustrations. Take care of your physical and emotional needs before it turns into pissy personality.

How grateful are you when you think about the fact that you were given a chance to be alive, as a human, almost by accident? When you truly value a gift given to you, how do you enjoy that gift? And how big is this Gift of Life compared to all the precious gifts you have ever received over the years?

If you think of life as a gift, and willing to consider that the giver – let’s not give names here — intended on equally benefiting all that has been created, you would know that the true sin is to waste the gift given to you – allowing your soul to suffer; or to do harm to the rest of that Creation. The Intention for the Creation is encoded in the Creation itself, proven and reassured by the state of prosperity resulting from different actions. There really is no way to defeat the Creation. If we mess it up here on Earth, we would only parish and proven us to be unworthy, and the Creation would just show the Magic elsewhere. We are simply not that important. So don’t expect the Balance of the Universe to be manipulated and disrupted just to ensure our survival or pleasure. And if we do wrong to ourselves, we suffer, or we die. So it is in fact very easy to read the Intention of the Creation: Be happy, and be helpful to others.

There are so many religious teaching telling you that Life is Pain, Suffer, Messy, … All true, almost. But the outlook really doesn’t have to be so grim. All the pain, suffering and messiness are to guide us to find our true Happiness, like the walls of a tunnel. The purpose of the walls are to tell you which way not to go – not just there to hurt you repeatedly. It is your own fault if you insist on running into it thinking that’s the way you have to go. So. Which way do you really want to go?

Each life event can almost always be interpreted in more than one way, with more than one layer of implication. It is our reaction to our interpretation that determines which way we are going to turn. And that, combined with the setting of the environment we are in, leads to the next event. Then, we would be given another chance to choose, to alter, and to redirect our future. If the next event holds a better picture, and make us happier, we are moving along the right direction. And if the next event doesn’t get better, it is time to stop and think. What’s the other possibility that seemed impossible? Is this event truly a worse event?

Think about how you can make yourself happy, for now and forever. If each choice were made with careful thinking, putting the environment and future into consideration, the next event would more likely be a better one. The range of our attention that we base our decision on, let’s call it the Consideration Bubble, determines the likelyhood of our next movement going towards the Right direction. The larger the Consideration Bubble is, the more likely the next event is going to go better.

When a person loses temper and fiercely defends a certain matter, the Consideration Bubble is almost skintight. The result, almost no way out. The better solution would be expanding the Consideration Bubble. Suddenly, the sky opens up. And when we can see more, and realize the benefit and purpose of our suffering, the suffering becomes joy. Knowing that our action and weight bearing is in fact setting us up for something better, we’ll have better direction, and could give more devotion. Then, things start to get better, faster.

If we practice on making choices for future benefit, we become much more willing to sacrifice. A lot of mothers are in that mode, for example. At the same time, where is the balance that we mothers don’t sacrifice so much that our own life becomes an experience of suffering? Remember, our children not only learn from our teaching, and more importantly they learn from our Feeling. Balance is the key.

Children have the ability to imitate an emotion of their adult without the physical trigger. Oftentimes, their emotional reaction to that event could be enormously larger than what an adult would perceive, because they often feel much less in control. Anxiety is often the re-experience of the intense emotional reaction to some related thoughts. That unpleasant feeling from the childhood makes people wanting to run away. But the more one tries to avoid it, the more often it would pop up at the worst moment. Life tumbles down the hill from there on, when the monster is thought to have grown bigger. How to redirect that mind-body connection? How can one sever that link? I believe that the Orgasmic Healing has the ultimate power, a forced ‘positive association’ might be the solution to help with seemingly impossible cases of Anxiety. But, don’t play with the fire if you don’t know what you are doing. You may get sucked into the whirlpool and taking a wild ride that you are not prepared for. Maintaining a balanced view is the key.

Only a balanced path can be a long lasting path. When we are moving towards the Happy direction, Happiness cumulates. And when we turn towards Unhappiness, our soul suffer.

People have a natural tendency to turn towards Happiness, if one is uninhibited, if they have the control over everything. Unfortunately, that’s not how we were wired. Since our infancy, we learned to please our environment before pleasing ourselves, because we need to be fed. That was the right way when we were little. But after we’ve grown up, where should the balance be?

To find the balancing point, you could measure the result with how you feel, and how long can you stand feeling this way before wanting to change again. Many people consider themselves reasonably happy, and then stop their thinking right there. They are afraid that if they dig further, their state of happiness is going to change. Well, that only means that you can make yourself even happier, and you just have to let it happen.

Just how profoundly happy are you? You are the only one who is responsible to make yourself happy. It is not a job for your parents, your spouse, your children, your boss, your coworker, your family or your friends. You are the center of your universe. How much longer would you allow your soul to suffer? Where is the way out?

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Steve Jobs: One Last Thing Netflix, instant streaming

Steve Jobs: One Last Thing

2011 TV-PG 55m Average rating: 3.976 Average of 71,069 ratings: 4 stars

Legendary businessman and Apple co-founder Steve Jobs changed the way Americans live, think and work before his death in 2011. This documentary traces his turbulent career and includes interviews with his associates as well as his rivals.

What’s your vision of your life and happiness?

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The Mood: Air – Johann Sebastian Bach – YouTube

You know what? By doing my organizing business, I can finally help people getting on their new path of having a happier life. I can be there at that turning point when they need Hope, Support, and Encouragement. And I can be the facilitator to help them materialize their wish, to share their understanding and mine. I learn so much from each person I met, either from socializing effort or from business contact. I am finally getting on my path of realizing my own most precious childhood wish, the one I had since I was 5 years old.

People say that dealing with Death could change a person’s perception of life, and pay more attention to his/her own life. I went through that change before I even understood what Death meant. It was a traumatic experience.

I don’t remember what my mother did on my 5th birthday. There was just the two of us. But somehow she made me feel something special was happening. I remember we had a conversation, probably the first serious conversation I ever had in my life. She told me that I was 5 years old, and that I could now spread out my whole hand and proudly say “I am 5 years old!”  But I was clueless what a ‘year’ is.

After clearing up the concept of day, week, month, and year, I realized that 5 years was supposed to be a very looooong time. Suddenly my consciousness awoke, looking at my mother: “Where have I been the past 5 years?!!” My mother told me of some previous events. I didn’t remember. It felt as if we were talking about someone else. So I wished that I could remember each day from then on. And in a way I did. I tried to feel, understand, and remember everything of my daily life. That was extremely important to me since I didn’t seem to remember anything of all those first 5 years of my life.

At that time, I was very shy. But I was not stupid. Unfortunately a shy person with a sharp tongue in the kindergarten could only earn me scratches on my face, instead of helping me to make friends with the children of my age. So I end up with having only one true friend.  He was a 63-year-old man whom I could have the pleasure of enjoying a good debate.  I remember once it even ended with me being in tears while insisting that I could make him cry. He was my first friend, my best friend, and my only friend. But soon he died.

I didn’t see him for few days, so I asked my mother where my friend, that old gentleman, had gone to. She told me that he went to the hospital.

“When is he coming home?”
“He is not going to come home anymore.”
“Why not?”
“He is dead.”
“What does it mean that he is dead? Where is he going to go if he doesn’t come home? Can I go visit him?”
“He is going to be buried.”
“How is that going to feel like? Isn’t it going to be cold and uncomfortable?” I tried to imagine how it would feel if I were dead or buried.
“It will not be uncomfortable for him. He would feel nothing, like in sleeping.”

She really thought that her explanation was going to ease my fear about Death. Instead, I couldn’t go to sleep for the next few weeks fearing that I might not wake up the next morning.

I was devastated. I no longer had someone who I could talk to, who could give me meaningful answers. Most of the time people gave me answers as if they had never thought of the matter seriously. I felt lonely. I remember the days and months of endless Q&As with my mother. I remember my extreme anxiety and nightmare while trying to understand the scary concept of Death, while dealing with the lost of my only friend. I was so scared I promise myself that I would not waste my life, that I would make every minute of my life as good as it could be.  But, what can be considered good?

When I was 9, someone told me that my existence was an accident and pure luck.  It was hard to comprehend the concept of none-existence of me.  Eventually I felt grateful to my good fortune and I wished to do good for my fellow human beings as a way to showing my gratitude for the gift of my life. I wanted to do things that, without me it would not have been done. That was a very childish desire, to be so unique that I was irreplaceable. As you all can imagine, accepting my common place among human was not easy. I learned and assimilated as much as I could from everyone I encounter, and learned about myself by watching me from inside, and outside. But I never managed to abandon my childhood wish — to do good for someone the way only I can.

And it seems that this wish is finally coming true, little by little. The hardship of my life has made me unique. Who I am and what I learned from my years of struggle is now helping me to understand, accept and connect with others when they are having a hard time in life. Recognizing the fact that each painful event in my life had helped to build a particular quality in me, I became grateful to all of my past trauma. I am happy for who I have become, and that I can make a living by helping people around me, and even help some of them getting on their path of having a happier life.

In my Organizing business, I keep on meeting people who really enjoys our conversation about Life and Happiness. And they are happy that they have found someone who would integrate thought organizing into home organizing. I even have a short term monitoring program to follow up with my customers on a regular basis until they form the habit of keeping things in place. Keeping an upbeat spirit works like magic. Though the path is not always easily found, yet there is one.

I want to make a lot of friends.  Now that no one is going to scratch my face when I talk, I can expand my world beyond my current circle.  I want to warm up my environment so I don’t have to feel cold any more.  And I want my friends to be happier because of me, even if it is just a little bit.

How often does a child’s wish come true?

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http://movies.netflix.com/WiPlayer?movieid=70052792&trkid=2450709

Netflix, instant stream

An assembly of writers, philosophers and scientists share The Secret, a principle that reputedly brought success to Plato, da Vinci and other greats and that can empower viewers to attain success in their own careers, relationships and health.

Interesting ideas!!!
Well, they are getting something right.

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Plot

Lee Holloway (Maggie Gyllenhaal), the socially awkward and emotionally sensitive youngest daughter of a dysfunctional family, adjusts to normal life after having been hospitalized following an incident of dangerous self-harm. She learns to type, starts to date an acquaintance from high school named Peter, and begins to work as a secretary for an eccentric attorney, E. Edward Grey (James Spader), who hires her despite her stilted social skills and unprofessional appearance.

Though at first Grey appears highly irritated by Lee’s typos and other innocuous mistakes, it soon becomes apparent that he is sexually aroused by her submissive behavior. After he confronts her about her propensity for self-injury and commands that she never hurt herself again, the two embark on a BDSM relationship. Lee experiences a sexual and personal awakening, and she falls deeply in love. Edward, however, displays insecurity concerning his feelings for Lee, and he shows shame and disgust over his sexual habits. After a sexual encounter in his office, he fires Lee.

During this period of exploration with Edward, Lee has also been attempting to have a normal boyfriend in Peter (Jeremy Davies), even engaging in lukewarm sex with him. After Lee is fired from her job, Peter proposes to Lee, who reluctantly agrees to marry him. However, while trying on her wedding gown she leaves and runs to Edward’s office where she declares her love for him. Edward, still uncertain about their relationship, tests Lee by commanding her to sit in his chair without moving her hands or feet until he returns. Lee eagerly complies. Days pass, as Peter, family members, and acquaintances individually visit Lee to alternately attempt to dissuade or encourage her while Edward watches from afar, completely taken with his arousal of Lee’s compliance. After three days, Edward returns to the office and takes Lee to his apartment where he bathes and nurtures her. The pair marry and happily continue their dominant-submissive relationship.

Shouldn’t Happiness of the Soul be worth something?

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Now that we have talked about Communication.  What are you going to communicate to your mate?  What purpose would your mate serve when you are trying to communicate?  You would not believe my findings from my observations.  But I am sure after some time you would realize that my findings are true.

Here is the analogy:
Oftentimes women treat their men as toilets; and would refuse to flush.  Then, they try to wash their face in that toilet, or to feed themselves and their children from it.  From time to time, they’d go to their All Girls Party to talk about what’s stuck on their face.  But interestingly enough, when they talk about what’s stuck on the OTHER person’s face, most of the women feel loving sympathy towards the one being talked about. Therefore the one being talked about often feels loved by her peers, instead of being loved by her mate.

Ok, Let me translate.  A woman easily dumps all the crap of life out of her system by talking to her mate — because she loves him and trusts him.  But she will not give him peace if he complains about anything.  And on top of that, she would not allow him to find a mistress and let it out that way — because she loves him and doesn’t trust him.  Still, she expects him to provide, to please and to protect — like a father would. But how could he make her happy when he is not, for so long?  So when women talk to each other about their lives and their men, they share the frustration and disappointment.  They feel understood and loved by the ones who sympathize with them.  But that could never satisfy the desire of being loved by one’s mate.

On the other hand, oftentimes, a man expects his woman to be like his mother, a chambermaid, and a hole in the wall.  When he can afford a chambermaid for real, he would often forget about the hole in the wall.  And soon the house collapses on him — The partnership falls apart when she finds him cheating.  Do I really have to translate this part?

Do people realize that when parents fight, the ultimate victims are their children? 

Children suffer from their parents’ struggle against each other.  Oftentimes one parent would use the children as weapon to hurt the other parent.  It is very effective.  But unfortunately he/she is hurting the children MORE than hurting the other party. STOP!!!  You are robbing the opportunity of Happiness from your own children and grandchildren.  Do you know how much conflict and struggle you instill into your own children’s psyche by causing him to hate or dislike his own parent — indeed he loves both his parents.  Children pay with their life-long struggle to resolve that internal conflict, and often pass on to their children if they can not successfully resolve the issues.  So, stop involving children in your struggle!  How childishly selfish can you possibly be?!!!

Here, I am not trying to provide any children with the excuse to blame their struggles on their partners.  I wish my readers would see a hint of the possibility that their own action alone can make a difference once their perception and intention is shifted to the right direction  — the direction towards their mutual happiness.

If you truly treat your mate as your partner in life, as the one you choose to share yourself with, and to share your life with, you might be willing to learn and understand the difference in the making of men and women.  Hopefully, you will be willing to accept the differences, find ways to compensate each other’s shortcomings, and act according to that understanding in a more constructive manner.  The truth is, most of the time, what happened that was not agreeable to you was not due to his/her intentional fault.  If you can see that, then there is a chance the two of you may find a mutually agreeable solution.   Staying together is not a must.  But being Friendly and Happy is.

Whether you know it or not, your current life is always the result of what you did before this moment.  I am not saying this to discourage you.  This information is meant to empower you.  Because, your life will start to change the moment you start to do something meaningfully different.  That is power!!!  And if you keep going in this new direction long enough, you may even see a new view, and start to live a new life.  But the key is to understand what you are really doing to your life and to your mate.

Now, guess why your life has not changed much no matter what you did, and no matter how you struggled?  Like a skillful artist painting the same animal from different angles, your mind is leading you to do the same thing in different formats.  Somehow your subconscious needs to recreate certain situations for you to understand something.  There was a monster you once saw in your childhood, and it has never left your mind since.  You kept calling it back, trying to have a closer look at it.  Yet you kept on running away the moment it showed a little bit of itself to you.  In your mind, the monster is getting bigger and scarier over the years.  But I can tell you that, your monster is not nearly as scary as you have imagined.  And it is definitely powerless against you NOW — you are no longer that child from a long time ago.  Would you like me to prove that to you?

When you’ve had enough of your current struggles, you might want something to change.  When you are ready to face yourself as who you really are, and willing to let yourself be examined by YOUR own mind with the utmost self-love and gratitude towards the greatest gift you were ever given, The Gift of Life, give me a call.  I will be honored to be the witness of your transformation, at your beginning of living the happy life you were made to live.  By allowing me to ask questions, and make logical connections, you will have me as the pen and paper you need, to sketch your inner desires into a clear image. Let’s see what your Mr. Monster looks like, and if he is really trying to scare you or please you.  You will find him no more than a circus monster, scary and funny, and quite harmless most of the time.

One thing I must mention before I end this blog.  No matter how hard you examine yourself, you will find a wonderful person in you, covered under layers of Social Valuation.

Of all the suffering souls I have met throughout my life since I was 10 years old — trust me that I have seen many, because people would tell me their stories in painful details, over many generations — I have never seen one soul that I could not consider beautiful and wonderful.  But every so often, he/she would do something so totally out of logic that made his/her soul suffer that I couldn’t help but ask “Why???”  And it was always because he/she acted according to certain Social Valuations, especially those outdated ones.  How can your soul not suffer, when you cage it in the box of Social Valuation that is too small for it?

If you measure everything you do against the degree of gratefulness you feel towards the Gift of Life, you would know what to do.  Ask yourself just HOW grateful you really are to be alive?  Because if you are truly grateful, you wouldn’t try to do things to make your life a suffering experience for your soul.  You would do everything to make it Happy.  What is Social Valuation compare to the Loving Intention of your Creator?  Why should you let other people’s unexamined thoughts rule your world? and to determine your fate?  Why don’t you find out who you really are, and live the life you were made to live, to it’s full potential?

Should I translate this part?  It means “You should do what feels right to you, if you respect yourself as a worthy human being, that your Creator would not regret to have created you.  But you should not be sloppy with how you enjoy the gift you are given, to allow yourself to live a suffering life or to do harm to others.” That’s the Creator’s ultimate judgment encoded in human design, mental, physical, psychological and spiritual.  If we do things against that Judgment, it can only lead to our own extinction.  And you can find proof everywhere, across the land, and throughout human history.

So, find out who you really are, and live a happy and self-respected life.

p.s.
I started a new business organizing people’s home and office a little while ago.  I often find myself end up making friends and organizing people’s mind.  Come to think of it, it makes total sense!

* * *
My Lord, there is nothing sweeter than the thought of how much I love you, when I think about how you have uncovered my true nature and changed my life.  

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Everyone says that Communication is the most important thing in a good relationship.  But what does it really mean?

I saw a lot of people started talking to their mate after learning that info, TELLING them what was in their own head.  Still, not a whole lot have changed, maybe even bit more arguments.  Then, there are still so many unhappy family, and traumatized children.

Good communication needs to have a lot more Listening than Telling.  Before we tell our mates what we want, did we hear what they’ve just said?  What did they say that they want?  Even if we are not able to give them all, shouldn’t we try to respond to their wish with our action?  Couldn’t we afford to give some before we get more?  It’s a much better deal if you would believe me.

And if one could learn to use all the sensors to hear what the other one is saying beyond the words can convey, mentally and physically,  one would soon be able to bring heaven to earth any time one desires.

This is how you build Sensitivity.

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I am an artistic lover. To me, there is no such thing called ‘having sex’. But there is this utmost important matter in life called the Art of Pleasure. If everyone treat their life as a piece of art that they are creating, this world would be a very different place. It is guided by our philosophy of life, whether you think you have one or not, and aided by the knowledge that one has. So that broadens the Scope of Work of what is involved in creating this piece of art. When I am not with my children or working, I am creating Pleasure, near or far, on site or off site, in bed or off bed, mental or physical, sexual or otherwise. Sex would only happen when it compliments the scene, and makes that moment complete. Don’t get me wrong, sex doesn’t always have to happen at a romantic moment. In fact a lot of the time it is not the case in my life. It has been part of our communication whenever the emotion is intense, be it happiness, sadness, pain, or guilt. And it doesn’t have to be done in a romantic manner either. Don’t waste time trying to figure out when and where to have sex. Think about how to make each moment more relaxing, more beautiful, more soul touching. Whenever you plan for a pleasant event, clear the rest of the day and beyond. It is great pleasure to enjoy a fun moment with someone who understand the value of pleasure. And if you can enjoy a simple moment to its fullest, then your loved ones would want to extend that moments into eternity. Anything is possible after that. A friend and I were planning to spend a day on the beach. So the exchange goes like this:

HER: Sorry about that – I was in the middle of a very good movie and lunch. Thursday works for me.

ME: Silly, my Dear! Plan what and when you want to do on Thursday…besides the beach. If. Sorry for being a disturb earlier.

HER: You aren’t a disturb :-) Will do – would like to get dolly back to you.

ME: Yes. I will meet you at the subway station, take it home, and then join you in the subway station going to the beach. Any better ideas?

HER: I could walk with you. We could have sushi then the beach/boardwalk. Would love to teach you to swim but Coney Island isn’t the greatest place for that.

ME: Sushi! That’s definitely a better idea! Deal.

HER: We can figure out what to do after that.

ME: But, do prepare to get wet. I don’t swim, but I love to walk in the water…water up to my chest.

HER: Oh that’s good for me – just have to remember to take Advil before – arthritis has been acting up, but if I do that I’m a lot better.

ME: By all means… and bring more for later, just in case you get detained by the beach. Sunset and evening is something most people miss. But that’s a sin.

HER: Oh that will be fun. We can get clams too.

ME: You are brilliant. The true pleasure lies in reaching the orgasmic state of everything we do…even the beach.

HER: Hee!

So this is the basic setting, and the rest is up to you.

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This is The Real Secret. Female Orgasm can be induced by stimulating any senses to it’s proper height, be it Sight (ophthalmoception), Hearing (audioception), Taste (gustaoception), Smell (olfacoception or olfacception), and Touch (tactioception), as well as the sense of Temperature (thermoception),… And I haven’t mentioned the various contact points of the partners’ body parts yet.

Needless to say, you can combine the stimulation of different senses, adding as many as you can manage. And if you run out of arms and legs, get help. ;-) So, can anyone imagine how many ways there could be to make a women cum?

But the real Magic is that the intensity of the orgasm could be dramatically amplified by engaging Every Emotion, be it Happy, Sad, Angry, Guilty, Jealous, FEAR. And the best part is, at the heightened orgasmic state, no matter how she feels about certain matter in the past, the thought of it can only help intensify her Pleasure instead of Anxiety, over and over again, until it loses it’s potency. So…

How to make use of that power of orgasm?

Now, look at Robert Plutchik’s Wheel of Emotions again. Imagine that instead of 8 paddles going towards 8 directions, proper engagement of different emotions with Orgasm can bring all the peddles to the Top.

Who was the genius that came up with the idea of “Positive Association“?

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The Simplest Secret of Sex
What do you think it is?

We can imagine so much…
More Variety
Newer Toys
Unusual Positions
Power Games & Sensation Play
Multiple Partners
Multiple Orgasms
Flawless Erections
Melting Sensuality

We may hope for even more:
Lasting Romance
Spiritual Fulfillment
& Eternal Devotion.

Yet Our Hopes Mean Nothing
If we are not Liked
Accepted
And Enjoyed for Who We Are.

Love is Nice with Sex,
But Liking is Essential.
Remember to Appreciate Your Lovers.
This is the Simplest Secret.

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As a Middle-Aged Woman, this is the time for us to wake up.  Powered by our knowledge that we gained from years of our struggle, we expand our inner and outer world; we defy what have held us captive; we explore what we have never dreamed of.  That’s when we understand what it really means to have Heaven on Earth when you can love one so unconditionally, to connect with the one you love, on so many levels, in so many ways, with so many dimensions.

Who would understand what it really means to be a PssssS – His very own ‘Private scientific sexy submissive super Slut’ of the Sex God?  How can a 25 year-old imagine the kind of sex life a 50 year-old can have?  They are still trying to achieve one orgasm in order to impress their mate.  And we are talking about “the Art of Pleasure” and 5 hours of “Anxiety Purging Massage“ until she passes out!  It can only happen by using the Magic.    This is f***ing HOT!

Most women are made to have multiple orgasms for a prolonged period of time, just like men are created to want new sex all the time.  And one of the most powerful stimuli for women is Emotion, ANY intense emotion.

If you search for “Women multiple prolonged orgasms“,  on Google, you will find a lot of articles and books telling you that MOST women are made to be multi-orgasmic.  And if it is not happening in your life, something is not being done right, and it may not always be the man’s fault.  So dig into this matter and stop saying: “If I am lucky, I would cum once, for xxx seconds. and I was done.” — I used to say that as well, and was very sure that I knew my own body after 30 years.

Unfortunately, most of the articles I read were only trying to teach techniques.  Understanding the techniques of when, where, and what to Touch is only one part of the puzzle, the second part is the giver’s Intention and Sensitivity, and the third is the receiver’s Emotion. The giver’s intention dictates How the touch is going to be, and that intention can amplify the effect to various degrees, depending on how much you apply your intention and sensitivity into your action.  For that, I am NOT able to explain merely with words.  I have to use demonstration.

Most of the time, the receivers are not actively engaging their emotions to intensify their orgasms.  Most people use sex for recreation, to bond with their mates, or just to passively receive pleasure for relaxation.  But prolonged multiple orgasm can do a lot more than that.  It heals.  It can help us to get rid of our Ghosts from the past.

How long can a woman stay in the heightened orgasmic state? For as long as one can physically last, until she passes out into sweet dreams. That’s what I mean when I say “And He, my Sex God, is very good at torturing me with pleasure, hours and hours at a time.”  And personally, I have given someone similar experience for 5 hours straight during a 7-hour “Anxiety Purging Massage”  Orgasm is the most powerful “Positive Association” one can ever have. It works almost like Magic — though not exactly by snapping my fingers.  But it didn’t take much more than that either. Well, ok, it took a lot more time… 7 hours.   Hey, for what it has achieved, it’s worth it.

Some years ago I went to a motivation seminar. I remember the speaker said:”Words have power. Beware how you use them. They will affect your life.” I was almost amused at how far-fetched that association was. Then he gave us an example: “Let’s say that someone wants to get a thousand dollars in order to buy a present for his wife. There are two ways to make that statement. One says ‘If I earn a thousand dollars, I will go buy a diamond ring for my wife.’ And the other one says ‘When I earn that thousand dollars, I will go buy a diamond ring for my wife.’ Which one do you think is more likely to succeed?”

I could feel the different sensations those two sentences aroused in me. The first person has doubts that he can’t even pinpoint where it came from. And the second one acknowledges the difficulty ahead, but also knows that it is just a matter of time and effort for him, because he believes that there will be a way, and that he has the will power to get there eventually. I began to pay attention to my wording from then on.

Negative words have negative energy no matter how well you justify the statement. When I observe people’s life, I realize from the words they choose, one can almost spot the focus point of their attention at once. And it has nothing to do with how true the statement is. There were times I would stop a conversation and ‘alter’ couple words for my friends before we continue.

I have a lady friend who is very cheerful, energetic, and enthusiastic about everything she does. She is at a major turning point of her life right now. We had wonderful conversations about how exciting it is to see life from a different angle and to feel her mind constantly expanding to more and more possibilities in life, and how she wish to find her mate that could truly make her happy. And then she said:

“I am happy that I’ve realized… even though life is difficult… now I can… But I can not forget how my first husband abused me. It happened. I need to remember it so I will not get in the same situation again…”

My heart sank to the bottom. I had to stop her right there and then. I told her that if she really need to mention her abused past in any future conversations with anyone, she could try to change the last two sentences to “I am sensitive to abusive situations.” And that’s all she needs to say about her past. She paused for a long second and then said: “You are gooood!” I am so glad that she got that.

Yes, my Dear friend. You can and you will allow that past to fade away. And you don’t need to remember it in order to protect yourself. You have God given subconscious to protect you from those situations happening to you again. If you pay attention ONLY to what you want, you will get it sooner.

This reminded me of another friend’s favorite quote: “Life is difficult.”

This friend of mine also had a very difficult life. From her stories, most of them seemed to be more mentally frightening than technically challenging. I asked her why she kept on using that phrase. She told me that it was a very famous quote by M. Scott Peck, an American psychiatrist and Author. Then she added: “Life IS difficult. It is true. And you don’t want to forget that. By saying it, you are no longer afraid of it. you’ll embrace the reality. That’s when things will change.” But from her voice, I did not hear hope, I heard only acceptance, dread, and profound despair. Whatever she was trying to do by saying that, it didn’t work.

Sorry my Dear. Though I love you deeply, and I often see much wisdom and enlightenment in your spirit more than a lot of people I know, I can not agree with you this time.

I went online to search for that quote, and I found it: “Life is difficult. This is the great truth, one of the greatest truths—it is a great truth because once we see this truth, we transcend it.” together with several other quotes, like: “Problems do not go away. They must be worked through…” Why didn’t she quote THAT?!!

Here is another quote from the same person: “The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers” Great statement of a psychological fact. But I am afraid in this case, he was more of a researcher, who collects data and draws conclusions, rather than a psychiatrist, who knows how to direct the mind to go to a more desirable way.

I would try to give a push to the mind that is reading about this part of life. If this is what a person seeks to understand. Instead of causing a passive acceptance and waiting for things to change by the arrival of the darkest moment of life, he/she can use a bit more light in the darkness, some proactive energy, and understanding of the reward of action — Control and Hope:

“The truth is that, if we don’t pay attention, our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers. Now we know that ‘step out of our ruts’ is all it takes, why wait for the ‘deeply uncomfortable moment’ to arrive?“

Do you know how many people are stuck at the “difficult” stage of life and never get to the “transcend” moment because they quote only half of the sentence? Isn’t “step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers” a greater and more meaningful truth to embrace?

Words have power. Watch what you are saying. Know what you are broadcasting to the energy field of your Universe. It will resonate, and give you a feedback loop, and expand. How do you want that to be?!!

— with much Love and Hope for the wellbeing of Humanity

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For 30 years, I had been disappointed trying to have a lasting relationship. I had 18 relationships before this one, ranging from 3 months to 9 years, including a failed marriage.  Each time I treated them seriously.  But eventually things fall apart, for various reasons.

You might think that I was difficult.  But I was not. All my male friends and female friends told me so.  But I did want something very specific.  I want intelligence, kindness, maturity, courage, and fun all at the same time, so we may have a true mental connection.  After going through failure repeatedly for 30 years, I gave up the hope that I would ever find a man who would make me truly happy.  Still there is noting else I could do but kept on meeting new man, one at a time, carefully exam the possibilities. I wish that I can find someone who could make me so happy that I would rather submit myself to his will, and be his slave. No one was able to fulfill that role.  Most of the time, after knowing that person better, I felt mentally lonely.  I end up being so disappointed that I was almost angry at Life.  But finally I lucked out.

So, when I gradually realized that this time, I had found what I had always been looking for, a man who has all what I ask for and much more, I said to him, “I’ve come to realize that I have always been looking for a Master, someone who is so good in so many ways that, I would do anything just to be around.  I think I might have just found one.  Would you be my Master?”  I have never felt so submissive before.  And it feels good.

Oh, submitting to someone like Him is not self-abuse, not in a way as if I were saying “I don’t think I am good enough, so come and abuse me.”  In fact it is a declaration and celebration of triumph, of finding what I have been searching for my entire life.  I would do anything to be here, to be with him, to serve his smallest need as well as the bigger ones, because it makes me happy.  Having him around, my soul is no longer lonely.  My heart is well taken care of.  I will be very happy with him because he will always think of something to excite me, to challenge me, to reward me and I will never stop growing.  I will never be bored again.  :-)

So, my submission was very much felt as a pleasure.  Now, we have been together for 3 years. Can you imagine how much pleasure it has grown into? and how many levels do we communicate with each other?  There was a time I counted — 5+.

For me, Sex with my man is something much more emotional than physical.  He had opened up an entire world for me.  And I am on my way to unite my Mental, Physical, Emotional and Spiritual world into one holistic and harmonious entity through Sex.  It has become a way we communicate thoughts, exchange love, heal ancient trauma, and explore our new horizon.  For him, I want to be not just a slave.  I want to be his PssssS – ‘Private scientific sexy submissive super Slut’  Don’t you think that sounds like some eternal fun?

Men, what’s your best feature when you ‘take care’ of Your women? Hardware or Sensitivity?  Is that a strange question?

Recently I asked some male friends of mine: “When is the last time you made a woman cum by kissing alone? by hugging alone? by only holding her ankle? by squeezing one nipple? by rubbing an ear? by command? by massaging her head? by pulling her hair? by letting her kiss your palm? by turning on a piece of classical music? by just thinking of you? or by letting her to relax on top of your back?” And the answer: “Wow? 90% of them, NEVER!”

The Hardware has expiration date, and limited manner of usage.  Yet the power of Sensitivity could only increase over time.  This is why, a true Master would  eventually end up with a harem when the rest of the ‘hard’ workers retire from the Rat Race.  Oftentimes, the harem would get so crowded that he has to stack them up on top of each other, literally.  And the secret?  Sensitivity.  If you work on her multiSensors, with multiMedia, you would achieve giving her lasting multi-O sooner — effective for 98% of women — a learnable skill for 98% of men.

This is not a fantasy.  It is Reality – though still only few men’s reality.  Most men can benefit from some enhancement of their sensitivity.  But few know that.  It has to start from Love of oneself, love of one’s mate and then beyond.  And hopefully this world would have a chance to be happier eventually.

So many men tried hard to impress others, to please their superior, their family and friends, as if that is going to make themselves profoundly happy.  And I often wonder how their personal life is like.  What really drives a man or a woman to be a workaholic? How many workaholics have a wonderful loving sex life with their mates?  How many of them became workaholics because they could not find true lasting pleasure in their personal life… or should I say, maybe because of that they have given up on achieving a loving sex life with their mates?  They may have tried for too long, far too long and too hard, by holding their action back, by suppressing their desire intended by the Creator, by denying their own right to primal pleasure.  It might have simply made their Life tasteless, and their living boring.

That could be why, when the duty became less heavy, when the children have grown up, when he/she starts to sense the approaching death, many go through ‘Midlife Crises’ — a painful awakening process only those who have experienced would understand.  Yet the rest of the world, even the rest of the family would disdain.  But the fear of death, the fear of missing the last opportunity to experience happiness would have empowered them so much, that they would ignore the entire world in order to chase after their pleasure.  Do they know how to do it better this time?  Yes, at least somewhat.  Do they reach their full potential?  Often not.  How do I know that?  I offer my vast number of still disappointed fellow Middle-Aged women as my witness.

I wish more and more fortunate women would come out and praise those men who made us fortunate; pay close attention to our men’s heartfelt desire, and make our men fortunate as well.  These men deserve the recognition, even if it is just anonymously.  At least our men would know how their loved ones benefit from their wisdom and effort. I want the rest of the population know that there truly is Hope.

Take good care of yourself.  Take good care of your heart and desires, because you are the center of your Universe.  The happiness of everyone you love depends on what condition you allow your heart to be in.  If you are happy, everyone who loves you will be happy, whatever you do for them.  If you are sad, angry, in pain, or in conflict, your loved ones can feel it, knowingly or unknowingly.  When you allow your heart to suffer, they will suffer, willingly or unwillingly.  So why not start with taking care of your universe by taking care of your heart?

Carlos Eduardo Gavito died in July 1, 2005.  He was considered one of the last symbols of the Milongueros Golden Era.  He was my most influential Tango teacher.

I am an avid Tango dancer.  For years I danced in Milonga at least 3~4 nights a week.  When I first started, the total number of Tango dancers in the entire New York City was less than a thousand.  By the time I retreated from the scene nearly 4 years later, there were about two thousand dancers in the City.  Now there must be way over five thousand.

I was definitely one of the Tango junkies (before the list got so long), going to most of the guest instructors’ workshops, knowing all the frequent dancers’ faces, buying seven pairs of Tango shoes during our trip to Buenos Aires…   But Tango had another effect on me.  It taught me the philosophy of Life and Love.

Interesting enough, learning Tango technique enlightened my ways of connecting with my partners, on the dance floor, as well as in life.  Gavito made Tango into a very simple matter: Tango is an elegant walk.  It is a three minute commitment.  “You lead, and at the same time, you follow.” — On dance floor, this is applicable mostly for the leaders.  As for the followers, we suppose to focus on only following.  But good following was not one bit easier than leading.  We used to spend hours to learn how to be good followers, not too strong, not too weak, not too fast, not too slow.  And of course, be at the spot the leader intended us to be by sensing the lead, not by being dragged there.  Boy!  A follower was basically trained into a mind reader.  But once you got it, dancing Tango with anyone became a walk in the moonlit garden — magical!

It sounds simple.  Yet it took hours and hours to work the sense into one’s intuition.  And then, you simply became good.  He taught us to work our sensuality into the dance, and never forget the elegance one must have, as well as the playfulness while submitting to the lead.  He taught us how a dancer should caress the dance floor with her feet, instead of stepping all over it.  He taught us the true meaning of partnership, and how to be a true compliment to any leader.

Everytime when I feel lost in life, when I don’t know how to react to life’s event, I think of what I would do on the dance floor that made me one of the top dancers in the city. Every so often, it would bring me back to the night when I danced with Gavito, when he said: “You made my night” at the end.  That was long time ago. It was at 92nd street Y, 1998.

Well, almost everyone knew that Gavito did not usually dance in Milonga, except for requested showcase, or, on rare occasion, danced with his stage partner, if she ever came with him.  Most of the time, he just sat there chatting with his friends and watch everyone else dance.  But, I didn’t know that until it was too late, until He had danced with me and one other girl in a Milonga that night.

It was towards the end of the night, when the floor cleared up a little. Though I had always wished for it, it was still shocking when he got up, walked up to me and lend me his hand!

The whole time I was so nervous I felt dizzy. So I moved rather slow, but stayed with the music. He taught me well.  Afterwards, he thanked me and said, “You made my night.” I murmured “Thank you!” and didn’t know what else to say.  I was still nervous after he returned me to my seat. My friend Ellen said something like “how interesting that He actually danced with his students!”  That’s when I found out that he usually did NOT dance in Milonga.  The host of the party, Daniel, a well respected Tango instructor also came over, pat me on the shoulder and said “Very good!  You did very nicely.” I almost felt embarrassed.

No one would remember this event any more, except me.  Gavito would remember me as a good student.  Yet even Him, wouldn’t remember that he had danced with me, because that could not possibly be the only night that he danced in the Milonga with a student.  Plus, He is dead, He died in July 1, 2005, of cancer.

I don’t need to Tango any more.  I’m Tangoing all the time.  It is the best addiction one can ever have.

I love him. He taught me Tango. He taught me to use the philosophy of life in dancing Tango. He taught me to use Tango philosophy to connect with people in life.

I don’t need to Tango any more, because I am afraid of ruining that very fond memory.  Plus, I am always dancing, in my mind.  But I know I will. I am a true Tanguera.

Every time I watch Him dance, my heart in flame, my body motionless…

* * * * * * *    *    * * * * *

Though the following video was recorded by an armature, I guess, and the sound quality wasn’t perfect, this video remains my favorite recording of His dance, ever, on stage or off stage.  I want to thank my fellow Tango dancer for capturing such rare moment of true spirited movement of His flaming steps and passion.  And I hope you get a sense of what Tango truly is, a connection, and a conversation with love, in peace and harmony.

  . 

And someone posted an interview of Carlos Gavito that I find very interesting: “TANGO IS A SHARED MOMENT“. (http://web.ics.purdue.edu/~tango/Articles/Gavito.pdf)           Yep, that’s his teaching… I remember it as “Tango is 3 min of total commitment.”

.

********************* (more fun Tango: )

And here is another video released not long ago:

For more authentic Tango experience, it is not the high flying legs that signifies the skill.  (I can’t watch those without my intestines twitching with anxiety) It’s the connection, like in this couple.  And it is indeed NOT impossible for You either.  Just hold on to your partner with your attention, because you want to be with each other, and let the body swing with elegance.

“Milonga del recuerdo”. Ariadna Naveira and Fernando Sanchez.

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I am glad that I am not the only one who sees his value and truly appreciates Him.  The Magic of Middle-Aged Women is starting to touch people’s heart.  People claim that their life have been changed for good, and for better.  I always know it is just a matter of time before good things start to happen.  He is truly life changing, proven by 30 years of the history.  Some of those stories were told in the book.  Many more are not.

“Your book(s) have changed my life. If somebody told me that an old tree can be replanted, I would not believe him/her. Not your books, you did. They are a reflection of you…”

“…I am more in control than ever before and I am not afraid of it… ”

“You restored my faith in humanity.”

“I am so grateful to have met you.  I wish you’ll be able to reach more people and make their life better.”

“I am thankful to the Universe for having created you!” 

I wish more and more people, men and women alike, would have a happier life because of him, and because of his books.

Is there a way to collect more of such stories, to share, and to encourage changes for more people?  This planet can use some more happier people, you know.

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The Magic Blog has a new posting: Keep hope alive! It is talking about an interesting article: Placebo effect significantly improves women’s sexual satisfaction. And I went on to find more to feed the hopes, not yet touching the matter that women can have prolonged orgasms:

Sexual Satisfaction in Women Increases With Age (Jan. 3, 2012) — A new study of sexually active older women has found that sexual satisfaction in women increases with age and those not engaging in sex are satisfied with their sex lives. A majority of study … > read more

Couples Report Gender Differences in Relationship, Sexual Satisfaction Over Time (July 5, 2011) — Cuddling and caressing are important ingredients for long-term relationship satisfaction, according to an international study, which queried committed, middle-aged couples from five countries. But … > read more

Sex Really Does Get Better With Age (Just Ask A 70 Year Old) (July 9, 2008) — An increasing number of 70 year olds are having good sex and more often, and women in this age group are particularly satisfied with their sex lives, according to a new study. Knowledge about sexual … > read more

But REALLY?!! Let’s not forget that no matter how significantly affected we might be by Placebo, or aging, it still takes our partner(s) some skill to get us there. For the first 30 years of my sex life, the total number of seconds of my cumulated orgasmic time, scored by my 18 partners, was estimated at 30x12x2x10=7200 sec, 2 hours. And my latest lover achieved twice that much in one night — though not on the very first night. I call him my Sex God.

Over the past 3 years, he has found so many switches throughout my body, I have to agree that I am made of all buttons — anywhere he touch, blow air on, or even just stare at, my body would start shattering. It is not I who is sensitive — since I am not able to make it happen on my own, it is HIM. And his latest achievement — talking with our guest about how reactive I am until… I had to interrupt his conversation, or I would have done something embarrassing. I knew it was not very Sub-ish to interrupt the Master’s conversation. But I wasn’t prepared to… you know. And I don’t think they were prepared to see that either.

With all due respect, I think one of the bigger reasons that a lot of us women are not sexually happy or enthusiastic is because most of our partners don’t do enough about understanding our body and improving their skill to take us where we are able to go. But I don’t think many men are aware of that. They might think that as long as they can give us a ‘hard time’, they got what it takes to make a woman sexually happy. Parsecs away from truth! Well, my 30 years of ‘hardship’ proved that. And most of the time, they were not able to get me near the edge, let alone over it.

I was chatting with some of my male friends lately and mentioned to them regarding that matter. They did not take me seriously at first. Then I asked, “When is the last time you made a woman cum by kissing alone? by hugging alone? by only holding her ankle? by squeezing one nipple? by rubbing an ear? by command? by massaging her head? by pulling her hair? by letting her kiss your palm? by turning on a piece of classical music? by just thinking of you? or by letting her to relax on top of your back?” And one of my friends’ answered: “Wow? 90% of them, never!” Now they want to find out where they can learn how to do that!

So, in deed, it is a situation full of hope, especially if our partner would pay a little attention to our reaction to what they were doing. By the way, it has nothing to do with ‘size’, or ‘hardship’. Sensitivity is 70% mental attention + 20% loving interest + 10% creative work. And then you will be looking forward to:

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Marriage. Honestly, what does marriage mean to you? Does it mean Rights? or Obligations? What rights and what obligations do you have in mind? If each of us make a list and exchange it with our partners, do you think your partner will show you a similar list?  Are you willing to do the same for your partner(s)?

Fair is fair. Men have different needs. The detail of the list can not be copied word by word to suit the other person. But there is something equivalent. There is a balancing point to make things work.  And the obligation to make ourselves happy has to take precedence to that of our partners.  This is true for both men and women.  Or, things are going to fall apart sooner or later — Modern people call it “Midlife Crises”.

Marriage, to me, can only be meaningful when it is a promise made by the heart. And don’t be surprised that our hearts may change, especially when we no longer feel loving or being loved.  And Love, like a tree, is a living being.  It needs to be constantly cared and nurtured.  Or it will die.  Ladies, your man is NOT your father — he is not just there to provide you with whatever you need.  And gentlemen, your wife is NOT your mother – not just to keep you and the children fed and your house clean.  You guys are partners in life, to make each other’s life better. And that includes happier heart.

There are plenty people who use marriage as a way to lure or trap the person they want to have.  There are also people who uses the money to do so.  Sad.  Do you think that you are so unlovable that you need to do that?  Don’t you think that you have some good quality that can attract a mate or two?  Money and marriage can NOT keep a person’s heart.  Eventually, he/she is going to wake up and realize that he/she has to do something to make his/her heart happy before he/she dies.  If you rely on your marriage or money to trap your mate, you’ve got a time bomb in your hand.  So, work on improving your quality.  You will be more attractive and much happier.

For one thing, a lot of women need to work intensively on their sex mind, to be more into sex — to give and to get. There is no goal or limit as for how far you need to go to make your mate happy.  You just need to keep going, however slow or fast your progress may be.  But I suspect that you will speed up once you have tasted the benefit of it.  Orgasms have healing power!  Be open-minded, be curious, explore the possibilities, entertain his little fetishes.  Constant progress is the key.

Over the years, I have heard plenty men complained about their women having low interest in sex. (By the way, a lot of times it could be because that the man was not doing it right, and the woman didn’t get much pleasure from it besides feeling being utilized, as part of their duty as a wife.  Cooking and cleaning is a different matter.  But sex is a terrible duty to have.)  Still, I know a lot of men hide from their partners the fact that they watch porn. I even have a friend who wrote me into his will that upon his death, I should just go to his place, take out his computer hard-drives and his porn collection disks!  I am honored, because he considers me non-judgmental.  Yet more profoundly, I am saddened.  I wish each man can find a partner who would accept him as who he is that he doesn’t have to hide his porn watching as a secret.  A woman who watches porn with her man gets a lot more Love, and a lot more Sex.   It pays well.

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While searching for photos of “Marriage” I came across an interesting article: 14 Ways to Affair Proof Your Marriage.  Boy! I wish they hadn’t mentioned “Quit the porn“.  Here are some comments related to that:

Jeremy   March 14, 2008 at 9:07 am

Except for the porn bit, which is ridiculous and a total stereotype (My wife and I enjoy porn together quite often, and completely writing it off like you have doesn’t apply to everyone), this article is spot on and very informative. Here’s to ten years with you next month, sweetie. :) “

And the author replied:

“I will concede that not all couples find porn destructive to their marriage, especially when they view it together. I was aiming more at men who look at porn apart from their wife, and use it as an easy way to get off, without having to deal with pleasing their wife and the work that goes into having sex.“

Really?!!  Girls! How is it possible to make your marriage work if having sex with you is going to be “work” for him?  Change that.  You can.

Peter    March 18, 2008 at 8:52 pm

I couldn’t disagree with you more about the porn. If your wife has a problem with porn, then, of course, it will cause a riff. However, my wife has no problem with porn. I have a higher sex drive than she does, and frankly, often she is not in the mood (we still have sex very regularly). She views the porn as a substitute, for when she isn’t in the mood (or is away). As long as I’m not turning her down and viewing porn, instead, then I don’t know why there would be a problem with it. And really, watching porn is never as good as actually having sex. We do also watch porn together, on occasion.

And here comes a despaired one. Do you want this to be how your husband feels?

Phil Collins    April 9, 2008 at 3:57 pm

Your article ’14 Ways To Affair Proof Your Marriage’ is a good article and advice for those couples who both are working and committed together. If one is not, then your article is useless. My wife and I have been married 43+ years, 2 fine grown children. A healthy sexual marriage begins mentally, in the head, the rest of the body just follows. The communication I hear constantly from my wife is negative and critical, pointing out what I do wrong. I know I have been a poor husband, I have admitted it, confessed this to my wife verbally and in writing and the response each time was silence. That is ok-as rotten as I have been, I don’t blame my wife. She deserves a better man than me. But good words of advice only work when both are committed to the same goal. There has been no physical contact in over 11 years except for a hug I tried to give to my wife, in a safe place-the kitchen and she acted like a teenager being hug by his mother in front of his friends-she couldn’t wait till the hug was over. I long to enjoy closeness and intimacy and I am not talking about sex but physical contact is just not in her interest. So all the articles in the world say the same thing but if both are not committed to the same goal, it will not work. I expect to go to my grave without ever again knowing and enjoying the beauty of the closeness of a woman.“

Here is another honest one:

Art   May 14, 2008 at 7:33 pm

Nice points except for the Drop The Porn suggestion. Men are visual and enjoy looking at it. Some women (especially younger women) enjoy it as well. Instead of denying yourself the wonders of fantasy and enjoyment of all that is on the internet (often for free), learn to be sensitive about it. Don’t shove it in your wife’s face if it’s not her bag of chips.

Explain to her that you’re a man and that you’re visual. Believe it or not, men can enjoy porn alone AND a real woman. Our sex drives are often much higher than women’s and porn is a nice way to calm the beast.

If she insists you drop the porn, she’ll just drive you underground. Of course, she should no more ask you to drop the porn than you’d ask her to stop reading romance novels…

and

TMo    May 20, 2008 at 7:46 am

I like porn. But so does my girlfriend. We bring it into the bedroom sometimes, and we enjoy watching it together. Mind you this is not something I force into our relationship, it’s actually her idea 90% of the time. I don’t really have anything against it, I don’t think, but she does get a little disappointed if I watch porn alone, like I’m stealing something from her or keeping something from her…

Here is from a woman, instead of cheering along like most other women:

Lisa   June 22, 2008 at 12:50 am

Seems good, except for the porn rule! It’s not like you’ll cheat her with a magazine or fall out of love with her because the piece of paper or DVD is hot.

Especially if your wife will not or cannot do some of the things you have kinks for, using porn can take a lot of pressure off her and remove tension in your relationship.

Women are smart creatures.  If you really want to make your relationship work, instead of just want your ego to be satisfied, find the way.  Your action says what’s more important in your heart.  And you will live to enjoy or suffer the consequences of your action.  It is Your choice.

As for me, I enjoy being a PssssS – His very own ‘Private scientific sexy submissive super Slut’ for my Super MAN. That’s how I love MY man. Because he is mine to love, to tease, to pamper, to cry to, to cry with, to toy with. And I intend to make him the happiest man alive.  And that includes a lot of things people don’t usually think a man should have.  But he is mine to spoil.  And he knows that no one else would spoil him the way I do.  Should I worry about him leaving me? Ha.

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Women can be too dramatic for their own good.  We know how to drive men crazy, as well as how to keep them calm.  So how should we make use of that?

If you really want your man to make you happy, find out what makes him happy.  That shouldn’t be too hard a task for us women, should it?  We have all heard men complaining about that they don’t know what women want.  Have you ever heard any woman complaining about that she didn’t know what her man wanted? ;- )

Basically, all men want Sex,… and Peace.  But giving them what they want has never been easy for us, for thousands of years now.  Why?

A:  We don’t want to give.
B:  Why?
A:  We don’t know why it is so important to give them sex, something seemingly much less important compare to our heart.
B:  But men are not made to worry about heart before he is satisfied with sex.  If you don’t like it, blame the Creator.  
A:  Well, but I don’t know How to give him more sex.
B:  Ask him.  All you have to say is:”If you can have your naughty wish, what would be on the list of things that you want to do with me?”

Men are our best teachers.  And if you can do any number of the things from that wish list, and find some help to do the rest of the list, he is not going anywhere.  And if he does, dump him.  Because he can not find a better place to get whatever he wants besides from You. But, do your best NOT to give him one thing that he doesn’t want – Noise.  And if you have to, coat it with sugar.  After all, the thought of not able to please you is hard enough for him already.  On the other hand, if he doesn’t care whether you are happy or not, then it is time to discuss, re-think this association and make decision on what you guys want to do with each other from now on. Why should anyone have the need or right to waste another person’s life in misery?

Women can be too dramatic for their own good.  Taming our instinctive reaction takes understanding and discipline.  But it is for the best.  Ultimately it is for our own best interest.

If you know that you can either be “Right” or be “Happy”, but you can not be both, what would you choose to be?  Do you really need to be “Right”, or would you rather be “Happy”?   My mother has always wanted to be Right regardless she was Happy or not.  But I just can’t see how it can be truly Right if me and my man are not Happy at the same time.  Well, what if you don’t like what he likes?

Fundamentally, men all like Sex, and Peace.  Do you have anything against having that for yourself?

You like Peace.  As a woman, you just don’t mind noise as much as a man does.  Plus, oftentimes it is you who is making the noise.  And if you try to remember how it feels at those moments, you had rather enjoyed the rush while venting at him that way and watching him cringe.  Didn’t you?  Yes, you were upset.  Because you think it is his job to take care of your needs, as a man should — like a father should, to a child.  But he is NOT your father.  And he doesn’t know better how to take care of another person’s needs.  The two of you are, in fact, partners on this lifeboat, trying to find a way to reach the Happy Land someday.

Men, on the other hand, have low tolerance to noise.

“After thirty years I finally realized that it is not ‘The caring one wins’ but ‘The noisy one wins’” – My Guru said today, commenting on the fact that his sister caused him to change his shirt before the three of us went out.

I looked at him. “Really!?  I fear for myself.” I said, thinking about something else, “since I always tried my very best not to make much noise.  Am I going to suffer from that?“

But what I truly know is that, not making too much noise is exactly why I get to be here with him, having tons of good stuff from him.  ;-)  I am not really worried.  If he is that stupid, to truly let the noisy one win, then he is earning himself a noisy life.  Then he doesn’t deserve Peace, or me.

So, if you also want Peace, then all you have to do is to figure out how to give him Sex.  Do you have anything against that?

Some of you girls do, because you don’t need much sex.  You were not made by evolution to want sex all the time.  So it is really unfair to ask men to regulate their action according to the same rule.  There are also those women who don’t want much Sex.  Now that, deserve to be further investigated, if you truly want to be happy.  But it might be something that would cause you Anxiety Attack.   Do you remember what was the thing we mentioned that has healing power against Anxiety?  Orgasmic Ecstasy.  What a dilemma!!!  But that could be the only way out, if you want to be Happy.

Shall we try?

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“So, this is what’s for dinner tonight.  Steaming hot, juicy, creamy…”

Steaming Hot, Juicy, Creamy Calzone: You couldn’t help but wanting to know how it looks like inside.  So you ever so carefully pry the slit open.  Shocking!  Spinach with stringy mozzarella cheese and oozing ricotta cheese gushing out and flowing all over…  OMG! Orgasmic!

Now, try to zoom in, by magnifying your browser display to 400%.

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Women can be too dramatic for their own good.  It is built into our system.  We have quickly learned from experience to use drama to control men.  For example, men are usually more kind and gentle when we cry.  But do you know that your well controlled man is not a happy man?  And if he is  not happy because of you, how can he give you more happiness?

My mother was a very loving person.  Unfortunately, her ways of dealing with problems and frustration were NOT constructive.  When she was upset about something, say my father’s one-time adultery, all she did was crying, bitching and moaning about everything else, and overly punishing her children for minor faults.  And when she could not find faults to pick on, she cried about her miserable life, and blamed our existence for preventing her from seeking a divorce and remarry.  She felt so hurt by that event that she never considered looking into the nature of the problem and figure out a way to repair the relationship.  And yet, she would not let him go.  All she did was holding grudges, keeping herself at a highly upset state, seeking every opportunity to vent her anger onto none related matter or people – because she was too anxious to even talk about the real problem.  She never thought that her peasant like manner, heartwarming most of the time, could be too raw and unattractive sometimes.  My mother had no clue why my father had that affair.  Because to him, she was mentally boring.  I knew, because I asked him to compare the other woman with my mother.  And he told me.

My parents never had a serious constructive conversion about their problem in order to better understand each other’s needs.  My mother believed in slamming pots and pans as a way to let my father know that she was upset.  And my father, feeling powerless in dealing with her temper, believed in the strategy of ignoring my mother’s emotional outbreak as the best way to solve the problem.  So eventually we children were the ones end up feeling her pain on our skin, while we were just doing what children usually do, annoying parents. In fact, we didn’t even have to do that to share her marital pain.  She was very angry for 25 years, since I was 12.  And my father never really tried to find a way to resolve the issue between them.  I don’t think that he even cared about how his behavior might hurt her feelings.  Being a witness and victim of my parents’ struggle, I was determined to find a way out of such misery.

Being forced to share her painful emotion on daily basis, l wanted to seek wisdom; to communicate, understand, forgive and peacefully coexist with men.  I was 17 then.  After 30 years of searching, trying, crying, thinking, and trying again, at last, I found a worthy man to practice what I have learned.  We are very happy together.

My man isn’t without fault.  But he has what many others don’t have, true love, maturity, and compassion for women.  History has proven that he has changed every life he touched, for good, and for better. (For that, you’ll have to read the Magic Book.) So how selfish I must be if I want to stop that from happening over and over again?

If you are seeking ways to limit your man, he will be seeking ways to expand his world elsewhere.  So if you are smart for real, expand his horizon, as well as yours.  Trust me, you two would have a wild and happy ride.  That’s one way to make it work.

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Men are powerless against women’s charm or torment.  That’s why they always choose to avoid telling women their mischievous desire if they suspect women’s detestation.  At the same time, men can not deny their creator’s design, and want more than most of us women would give.  This picture symbolizes the power of the women by representing the ancient Greek philosopher Aristotle as he carries his lover Phyllis  on his back. Though I think he might be rather enjoying this. “Aristotle’s analysis of procreation describes an active, ensouling masculine element bringing life to an inert, passive female element. On this ground, feminists have accused Aristotle of misogyny^[58] and sexism.^[59] However, Aristotle gave equal weight to women’s happiness as he did to men’s, and commented in his Rhetoric that a society cannot be happy unless women are happy too. – from wikipedia”    Still, the question remains: What could us women do with the men we want to keep?

Give your man Peace, as well as a lot of Sex, in many ways, of many kind.  In return, he would seek to fulfill you the way you could never have imagined – hours of orgasmic ecstasy, offered to you on his knees, with both hands, literally.

Going into a shower now.  My man is waiting.  Chat you later.

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Gentlemen, my attention would always be on women.  Though I would like to be friends with men, I don’t want men’s attention.  It is no use to me or you for another man to give me more than friendly attention.  Your loving attention should always be aimed at your woman.  Only then, we can be a good team to find a way to make her happy, and therefore to make you happy.  So, be my friend.  You will be greatly rewarded.

Ladies, I want only for you to be happy, to be unconditionally happy.  Together, let’s find a way.   All you have to do, is to keep the door to your mind Open.  And if you ever have any doubt, ASK. Don’t shut the door.  Because That is your only way out of that darkness – to make peace and happily coexist with your men.

And if you realize THAT and promise to do your best, I guarantee what you will see ahead is …

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Woman, what does your man deserve?  If he doesn’t deserve much, go get another one. And if he does, and if you want him to be yours, prove that you are woman enough to give Your man more than anyone else can.  How  could he ever leave you?

Picture yourself in this painting and make it into a movie. What do you see?

Your man is not your father, unless you want to get only a father’s love from him — then don’t blame him for getting someone else to be a woman to him.  In that case, you are not deserving, and the relationship won’t last long without your man suffering, if it even lasts. If he has that much value to you, treat him the way you treat your treasure.  If you feel love from him, give him what he gives you.  If you are having a renewed life because of him, how dare you give him less than what he wants?

But first, you must be sure that he is worthy.  Or leave.  No man is worth you suffering Your life for.

Grow up, get out of your needy mode, and be a real woman, to a Man. Think!  What are you doing to your man?  What are you doing to your own life?  What do you really want for yourself?  If you  are not happy with your man, yet you can’t see what you are doing wrong, give me a call.

YES, the Magic Book is life changing.  If you want to know how, ask the one who wrote the book.

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Forgive me for using rude words.  Men can be so stupid sometimes. I really feel sorry for those who can not manage their desire of wanting more sex, and can not manage their women while they give in to their sexual desire in secrecy.  Why don’t you also make it into a pleasant advantage for your mate?

My friend Roy is trying to stay in a relationship with Cindy. But he can not enjoy sex with her.  Roy has an ex-girlfriend Gilda who he managed to stay in touch and has sex with from time to time.  But he can not be in a relationship with Gilda because she has bi-polar disorder, and would freak out on him whenever she has a bad day.

Somehow, Roy end up getting into a situation where Gilda texted Cindy in the middle of the night after they had sex, while Roy was still sleeping in her bed.  So you can imaging what he was going to face the next day when he went for the church service where he usually meets Cindy.  Knowing Cindy, I wouldn’t be surprised if one day Roy returns home with a dagger on his back.

What’s wrong with him?  Men should know that there is no hiding things like this from their women, not for long.  And if a man is married with children, he has much more to lose in such situation.

I do not suggest that men should suppress their desire and live in misery for the rest of their lives.  It is impossible and unfair.  Men are made differently from women.  They really would enjoy sex for pure physical reason, and they would prefer to keep changing.

For those who have occasional sex with such man, don’t feel bad that he has no intention to build a future with you.  He does enjoy sex with you as he said, but he has no intention to leave his wife, his children, and a big chunk of his wealth.  And if you think causing trouble is going to help with your situation, you are very wrong.  You are only going to cause him stop having sex with you and go elsewhere.

And for those women who married such a man, don’t worry that he might leave you anytime soon.  But if a woman starts to give her man some drama for such encounter, your action is the only reason for him to give up on you.  WHAT is to be done?

To ask a man not to want more sex is like to ask a woman not to want more love.  So many couple struggle with each other because of this gender difference.  So many marriages were ruined because they could not survive such struggle. So many children were traumatized by their parents’ divorce.  And in turn, they grow up having difficulties settling down in a relationship.  Or, for those who find a way to settle down, they went on repeating their parents’ misery.  Eventually they traumatized their children, and condition the third generation for a life long struggle.  WHERE is the way out?

Why can’t men and women share their desires?  Why should women condemn men for their desire of excitement of sex.  What’s wrong that they want some varieties from time to time?  Sex is supposed to be pleasurable, on more than one level.  It is supposed to be mental and emotional, besides physical.  Human are made to enjoy sex as a form of entertainment, and more.  Otherwise, we would all be like animals which would only care about sex during the mating season.  So, if you think that men should not want to have more variety in their sex life, blame the Creator.  But don’t try to fix what God has created.  You simply can’t.  It is like wanting any of us to eat one dish for our entire life, would you still enjoy your meal after three days of eating the same thing?

I am not suggesting that we should have no discipline in our sexual conduct.  I am saying that we should try to have less limitations with our own sexuality.  After all, sex is highly emotional and spiritual.  There is more to sex than just getting physical pleasure.  It makes people feel close to each other.  So why shouldn’t any of us, men or women, try to use better sex to strengthen the connection with our chosen mate?

But how?

Why don’t we start with exploring each other’s mind, learn about each other’s fantasy, and try to assimilate the other person’s ideas?

Some people have difficulties abandoning their sexual limitation.  It should be accepted and respected by both partners.  At the same time, find ways to resolve it.  I can promise you that whenever you find a way to get over any of your hangups, your will feel so much happier, and so much empowered.  And if you can’t figure out a way by yourself, talk to a professional, or an open-minded friend.  Or start a discussion here anonymously.

There is never an unsolvable problem, if both parties are working towards the same goal.  There is only different solutions to different situations.  We just have to find one that suits your situation.

Next related topic: Women can be too dramatic for their own good

But, something else first…

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I have been brought upon the path of effective Ghost Busting – not the ghost most of the people meant, a spirit of some sort.  No.  That is not the subject of my interest.  I am talking about the things that gives you Anxiety.  I am talking about finding a way to deal with anxiety, to make it much less bothersome, and to eventually be free of its grip.

There is no way to change the past.  But we don’t have to be disabled by our past, especially when those events are no longer happening.  We want to be happy, to live like normal people whose life has not been affected by those unfortunate events. Since we can not run away from the occasional thoughts of our past — we have tried that already — we don’t want to be affected.  Or, if possible, we want to reduce the negative effect of our past to almost nothing.  And now, there might be a way.

I want to make one thing clear.  As magical as it is, Orgasmic Healing isn’t Magic.  It is science.  It is as scientific as the creation of the Universe, the creation of life form, the creation of sickness and cure.  It is as scientific as the creation of modern technology like car, TV, cell phone, and nuclear bomb. The effectiveness of Orgasmic Healing lies in the repeated effort, as in any form of work we do to achieve success.  Healing takes time. The only difference is, it is Pleasurable.  That’s right.  It is like when your are curing a cancer, the treatment is eating your favorite chocolate.  Wouldn’t you be pleased?  It is using pleasure to counteract the power of negative reaction we usually have towards those traumatic events that happened in our life.

So, how?

The scientific research has been done for a long time now.  It is like knowing the details of the pieces of a puzzle, and it would mean nothing if people don’t put the pieces together.  But, putting the puzzle together takes a very different set of skills.  It is more than just the study of details.  After all, human mind is a very complicated thing.  Or, is it really?  For example, if you want to go from one city to another, does the billions of grains of sand on the road, the countless trees and houses make the trip impossible?  Or, all you need is a map without much of those details?

This might sound unbelievable… Would you like to find a way to let those bothersome matter bring you pleasure, instead of Fear and Anxiety? The science is simple. There are many ways to excite a woman to the orgasmic state, and it can be maintained for a long time, hours.  At the same time, one of the most powerful stimulant is emotion caused by thoughts.  How to make use of this knowledge to Heal people?  The effective application takes superior sensitivity, deep understanding and refined skill.

“Is it possible?!!!” you might ask.

“Well, it has been done, to some people.”  — I am speaking from experience, as a beneficiary, as well as a benefactor.

I wish there is a way to share this knowledge and make some people’s life better.  After all, so many people has been suffering from Fear and Anxiety.  So many people have been disabled by their Ghosts from the Past.

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(The book review.)

If a man wants to learn how to please his woman immensely, this would be a good place to start – appreciate her, understand her, and then improve his skill.  If a woman wants to know what MORE is possible for her in her life, this would be a good place to start – to see, to understand, and then to explore.  The two of you can be very happy together, and have a lot more in your life, together, and separately.

If only a man would truly want to understand women’s struggle, he would go and ask his woman if she prefers him giving her half an hour of orgasmic ecstasy each round, a dozen rounds a night; or she prefers him holding and kissing her, bringing her flowers and presents, talking about how much he appreciates her heart and magic, as well as the heart and magic of younger women he long for, if not already had.

Half an hour of orgasm each round for a dozen rounds? I have heard women express disbelieve, until they themselves experience it. I have heard men express amazement and envy, wishing to find out where they can learn the secret to please the woman they love. And of course there are plenty people prefer to lay back, cuddle, and talk about the hearts, the heart surgeries, as well as why there is such a thing called midlife crises.

The author has approached Life and Love from a Philosophical and Psychological point of view, and realized that “Age brings out the best in women.” and wished that, “If only men realized…” But, is men’s realization going to be enough? How many women, young or aged, have realized their potential themselves? For example, if women realize that it is possible for almost every one of them to have 12 rounds (or more) of half an hour ecstasy; and if I tell you that there is a place that your man can learn that from another man, would you still prefer him cuddling you, and talking about your heart? Does your heart need all that talking? Or, if your man goes to learn how to give you better sex, how much heart has he just put in to appreciate yours?

Life is a gift, and we should not treat it like an accidental penny we found on the street. Every minute deserves to be spent with gratitude and serious consideration. With the spirit of an explorer seeking ways for deep improvement, the author underwent his own transformation and found the way to unite Sex and Romance into one holistic unity. In the book, he shares his experience, research and understanding with great honesty, humility, and generosity. Benefiting from his exceptionally high intelligence and advanced education, as well as lifelong studies of Philosophy, Psychology, History, Art, and Humanity, he presents his own experience of life for public examination and discussion. It is his pure kindness and empathy that inspired him to write this book. It is heroic for him to show such courage to the people that he does not know. He is showing us a way out of our everlasting gender struggle throughout human history and across the land. The least we can do is to think about our own life and try to treat it seriously.

Sex is so commonly considered as a form of entertainment that many men feel the need to hide their enjoyment of watching porn from their partners. If a couple do not share their sexual entertainment together, one can bet on that their hearts are not so close as they claim to be.

Sex is so unimportant in our lives that people use sex to define their social status more often than the education or skin color. Just check out how many names are related with sex – straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, married, single, separated, monogamous, poly, kinky. Even when the marriage falls apart, it is signified by whether or not there is sexual involvement – having an affair – have you heard of people having sexless affair? And of course, I’ve also heard people saying that hot kisses and fingering is NOT sex. It is clear, I hope, that sex is definitely not the most important thing in our relationships. Otherwise only the prostitutes could claim to have real relationships.

The author has missed a big point. Besides those people, both men and women, who are going through, or have gone through the evolution of self-recognizing, self-approving, and self-loving process, most of the current society is not ready to view sex as a form of serious matter, to be related to a person’s psychological development. In fact, a lot of people still consider psychology a myth, and psychotherapy a shameful procedure only designed for the ‘crazy’ people. And under such social condition, the author tries to relate sex with the psychological development throughout a person’s life? Can you imaging the size of the gap people have to step over to get to that level of understanding? The gap would be wider than the Grand Canyon – how else you think people could get so lost – they thought this book is meant to be some form of entertainment!!!

On the other hand, this author has a history of writing books that took nearly a decade to be accepted by American society, open-minded as we claim to be. Is he leading the thoughts again? “Seems like you are a trend setter celebrating the fluidity of sexuality and age.” — a comment on the fan site on Facebook.
[https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Magic-of-Middle-Aged-Women/149525718549775]

Ladies, understand your own mental and physical potential, and understand that you can be unconditionally happy no matter what happens in life. Orgasmic Ecstasy has healing power, against anything that bothers you, anything that gives you anxiety, anything that angers you, anything that saddens you, anything that scares you, anything that hurts you when you think about or talk about. Measure your man’s heart by how much heart he puts in pleasuring you, not by the size of his mouth and how well he talks. It is just a hole on the wall for you to stuff food in, if it doesn’t do anything else to pleasure you. Make sure that sex is not the most important thing in your life, but do get plenty from him, because it will warm your heart. Otherwise I can guarantee you that he is wishing for, or thinking about giving it to someone else, even to a stranger, if not already has.

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00C5YSBFK

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This is The Story of O

O o 0 ° Ò Ó Ô Õ Ö ò ó ô õ ö Ō ō Ŏ ŏ Ő ő Ơ ơ Ǒ ǒ Ǫ ǫ Ǭ ǭ Ǿ ǿ Ȍ ȍ Ȏ ȏ Ȫ ȫ Ȭ ȭ Ȯ ȯ Ȱ ȱ ȸ ȹ ʘ Ό Φ ο σ ό Ϙ ϙ ϴ Ͼ Ͽ О о Ѡ Ѳ ѳ Ѻ ѻ Ѽ ѽ Ѿ  ҈ ҉  Ӧ ӧ Ө ө Ӫ ӫ ᵒ Ṍ ṍ Ṏ ṏ Ṑ ṑ Ṓ ṓ Ọ ọ Ỏ ỏ Ố ố Ồ ồ Ổ ổ Ỗ ỗ Ộ ộ Ớ ớ Ờ ờ Ở ở Ỡ ỡ Ợ ợ ὀ ὁ ὂ ὃ ὄ ὅ Ὀ Ὁ Ὂ Ὃ Ὄ Ὅ Ὠ Ὡ Ὢ Ὣ Ὤ Ὥ Ὦ Ὧ ὸ ό ᾨ ᾩ ᾪ ᾫ ᾬ ᾭ ᾮ ᾯ Ὸ Ό Ὼ Ώ ῼ ⁰ ₀ ₒ ⃝ ℗ Ω ① ② ③ ④ ⑤ ⃝ ⑥ ⑦ ⑧ ⑨ ⑩ ⑪ ⑫ ⑬ ⑭ ⑮ ⑯ ⑰ ⑱ ⑲ ⑳ ⓪ ⓫ ⓬ ⓭ ⓮ ⓯ ⓰ ⓱ ⓲ ⓳ ⓴ ⓿ ◊ ○ ◌ ● ◦ ❶ ❷ ❸ ❹ ❺ ❻ ❼ ❽ ❾ ❿ ⓿  …… ∞.

Can you see how many ways women in the world can reach Orgasmic Ecstasy?

So I was right about this. Some research paper, multi-pages:

“… Orgasm lasts for a few seconds (normally not over ten); continued stimulation can produce additional orgasms in females. In brief, after one orgasm a male becomes unresponsive to sexual stimulation and cannot begin to build up another excitement phase until some period of time has elapsed, but females are physically capable of repeated orgasms without the intervening “rest period” required by males. …” – http://www.cerebromente.org.br/n03/mente/orgasm_i.htm

“Researchers at University in New Brunswick, NJ, believe they have isolated a chemical that produces orgasms in women.  … The finding could lead to a pill that would give a person the same sensation as an orgasm and might be used in treating pain. “

And maybe Anxiety too?

“maybe” – the Guru said.

Only if focused thinking is encouraged during the drug effective time. Finally, the pill of happiness is created. But this is a pill that would only work the Wonder when the most important ingredient gets in there – the thought that gave that anxiety.

Love you, my Lord.

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Things happened in our past. Bad things. It is no longer happening. But why is it still hurting us with the mere thought of it? We are not able to travel back in time to the moment when things first happened.  If we could, we would definitely interfere with the time line just to stop the pain of all the years after that.  But we are not able to time travel backwards.  So we are stuck in this struggle, and the pain only intensifies every time when we want to run away from it.  If we think about it, we feel the intensifying sensation overwhelming us, until we pass out.  If we don’t think about it, it haunts us like a ghost, appearing at the most unexpected place, when we are most vulnerable. Where is the Ghost Buster?  And how Real can it be?

*   *   *

It started 3 year ago, when I first met my Master.  Well, we were just pen-pals then.  He is a grand man, and extremely gentle.  Our first meeting was Six and Half hours long, just talking, about everything.  Moved by his kindness and exceptional intelligence, I decided that I should try to open my world to him, because he could be a worthy visitor.  I had been disappointed so many times in my life.  I have given up the hope of finding that true connection with a man who can make me really happy.  But somehow, he made me feel that maybe I should give the idea another try.  So I started writing my thoughts out and sent them to him, as if we were having a long chat. That conversation never ended.  It is getting warmer everyday.

Pygmalion and Galatea

I may not really know how Pygmalion feels, I do have a chance to taste what it’s like to be Galatea at this point of my life.  It is still in progress, like being shown in the painting.  Every moment is so magical. I wish it never ends. … …

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