For 30 years, I had been disappointed trying to have a lasting relationship. I had 18 relationships before this one, ranging from 3 months to 9 years, including a failed marriage. Each time I treated them seriously. But eventually things fall apart, for various reasons.
You might think that I was difficult. But I was not. All my male friends and female friends told me so. But I did want something very specific. I want intelligence, kindness, maturity, courage, and fun all at the same time, so we may have a true mental connection. After going through failure repeatedly for 30 years, I gave up the hope that I would ever find a man who would make me truly happy. Still there is noting else I could do but kept on meeting new man, one at a time, carefully exam the possibilities. I wish that I can find someone who could make me so happy that I would rather submit myself to his will, and be his slave. No one was able to fulfill that role. Most of the time, after knowing that person better, I felt mentally lonely. I end up being so disappointed that I was almost angry at Life. But finally I lucked out.
So, when I gradually realized that this time, I had found what I had always been looking for, a man who has all what I ask for and much more, I said to him, “I’ve come to realize that I have always been looking for a Master, someone who is so good in so many ways that, I would do anything just to be around. I think I might have just found one. Would you be my Master?” I have never felt so submissive before. And it feels good.
Oh, submitting to someone like Him is not self-abuse, not in a way as if I were saying “I don’t think I am good enough, so come and abuse me.” In fact it is a declaration and celebration of triumph, of finding what I have been searching for my entire life. I would do anything to be here, to be with him, to serve his smallest need as well as the bigger ones, because it makes me happy. Having him around, my soul is no longer lonely. My heart is well taken care of. I will be very happy with him because he will always think of something to excite me, to challenge me, to reward me and I will never stop growing. I will never be bored again. :-)
So, my submission was very much felt as a pleasure. Now, we have been together for 3 years. Can you imagine how much pleasure it has grown into? and how many levels do we communicate with each other? There was a time I counted — 5+.
For me, Sex with my man is something much more emotional than physical. He had opened up an entire world for me. And I am on my way to unite my Mental, Physical, Emotional and Spiritual world into one holistic and harmonious entity through Sex. It has become a way we communicate thoughts, exchange love, heal ancient trauma, and explore our new horizon. For him, I want to be not just a slave. I want to be his PssssS – ‘Private scientific sexy submissive super Slut’ Don’t you think that sounds like some eternal fun?